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MAJ1

@[email protected]

Member of the Great Migration of Nov 2022

Retired mainframe storage manager, channel Marvin the Paranoid android, like cats, tech, open world games,nature.

Very amateur scientist /astronomer / climatologist.
Wide musical tastes, scouse sense of humour.
Absolutely no time for “alternative” facts.
Nullifidian
No Alt-Txt = No Follow!

https://justmytoots.com/@[email protected]

Avatar: A red squirrel wearing elven style armour with a winged helmet & a sword.
Banner: An IBM ES/9000 in a small computer room.

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. View on remote instance

@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to random

Good evening Squirrel Fans.

This is me when I go shopping with Mrs S! :-

“You stay here. I'll whistle if it's safe to follow me."
"What will you do if it isn't safe?"
"Scream.”
― Terry Pratchett, Pyramids

Right finding that there is soooooo much to do in the KCD2 2nd map.
Also far more concerned with my wardrobe than I am in real life!

Catch you fab folk tomorrow!

Wherever you are, whatever you are doing, I hope you’re well & safe! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

For today’s diary update please follow

Picture a squirrel in a John Travolta style dance pose , the caption reads: “People will stop asking you questions if you answer back in interpretive dance! “ Credit: DDG find.
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@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party avatar TheBreadmonkey , to random

Vegan chilli at night, shepherds delight. Vegan chilli in the morning, shepherds warning.

MAJ1 ,
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@TheBreadmonkey Morning Ben 👋😊

Ohhhhhh my eyes are watering just thinging about it!

Have a good day mate! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

MAJ1 ,
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@TheBreadmonkey 😆

This is what happens when your a top Fedi Mister Ben! 😊

@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to random

& G’day Squirrel Fans, hope I find you bright eyed & bushy tailed!

Happy Tuesday to everyone who celebrates, commiserations to everyone else!

So the question today is how fast can i get my chores done as I’m at a really exciting bit in KCD2 & wanna get back there as soon as!

At least its summer in the virtual world, not like this persistently grey & dreary winter we are having in the
UK this year!

Cashew later Peeps, have a fabulously nutty day ! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

Picture a grey squirrel facing us, holding a small coffee cup, the caption reads: “Just a cup or 2 to get a jump start on all the nuts I have to deal with today!” Credit: DDG find.
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@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to random

& G’day Squirrel Fans, hope I find you bright eyed & bushy tailed!

It’s finally actually Friday!
Hving spent a decent chunk of yesterday convinced it was Friday it’s quite the anti-climax to have it delivered to my door!

Admittedly it’s in a sorry state, it’s sprung a major leak,all the colour has been washed out of it & to top it all the thing is as cold as a day old haddock!

We are apparently going to my late MiL’s this afternoon for another tidying up session, Mrs S has wangled a ½ day off. This is instead of not as well as going over during the weekend.

Hey ho, best finish my coffee & get on with my chores.

Cashew later Peeps, have a fabulously nutty day ! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

Picture a close up of a red squirrel with a slight smile on their face. The caption reads: “Just popping in to wish you a Fabulous Friday!” Credit: DDG find.
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@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to random

& G’day Squirrel Fans, hope I find you bright eyed & bushy tailed!

Thursday has arrived - I fought my way out of the grips of my Lovely warm, snug duvet to face the day & having faced it am toying with the idea of seeming if my duvet wants another snuggle!

No plans for today - I did play some more of the KCD2 trial yesterday just to use it up & I was drawn in by the story some more … if I can get the hang of the melee fighting then I might go wild & get it.

Cashew later Peeps, have a fabulously nutty day ! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

Picture a small red squirrel with their nose poking out of their drey. The caption reads: “When you wake up thinking it’s Friday… Then find out it’s only Thursday! ” CREDIT: DDG find
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@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to random

& G’day Squirrel Fans, hope I find you bright eyed & bushy tailed!

The first Monday of the year has dropped off the calendar.

It’s looking like a bright sunny day again, we had a smattering of snow overnight but only enough to make it look like someone has thrown a giant dust sheet over the street.
Flipping cold -4ºC at the moment with temperatures not looking to get above zero today.

I slept ok but feel tired & drainied this morning so will likely semi-hibernate thru the day, snuggled up with a hot drink & a good book.

Cashew later Peeps, have a fabulously nutty day ! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

Picture a grey squirrel peeping out from a stack of chopped wood. The caption reads “Hiding from Monday”. Credit: DDG find.
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@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to random

Good evening Squirrel Fans.

With a whole new year ahead of us I thought this quote rather appropriate :-

“Fantasy is not about escaping reality. Fantasy is about creating reality.”
– Terry Pratchett

Off to read my book & then to bed, catch you fab folk on the morrow!

Wherever you are, whatever you are doing, I hope you’re well & safe! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

For today’s diary update please follow

Sleeping gray squirrel wrapped in white fleece.
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@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to random

& G’day Squirrel Fans, hope I find you bright eyed & bushy tailed!

Monday has arrived, as Mondays do.

Off to my late MiLs again today, some medical kit is to be collected & then we have a meeting with the preacher who is doing the funeral service … the celebrant I believe the correct term is.

Busy day so I best go ablute and have a shave!

Cashew later Peeps, have a fabulously nutty day ! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

Picture a close up of a squirrel standing on the edge of a wooden deck with greenery & woodland in the background. The squirrel has a slightly bemused expression on their face. The caption reads:”What Monday, already?” Credit: DDG Find.
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@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to random

That moment when you think you’re gently teasing someone & they unfollow you 🫣😔

@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to random

Dear Fediverse I have eaten my 2ND wafer thin mint!!

Picture a squirrel wearing plate armour, with a helmet that has a furry plume at its crest. He is standing upright with his arms spread wide , a 2 handed sword, point resting on the mossy log he is standing on, is in his right hand. Behind him the sun streams the thru the pine forest in which he stands! Ai generated with help from @PixysJourney@beige.party
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@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party avatar TheBreadmonkey , to random

I cannot be trusted with access to unlimited food

MAJ1 ,
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@TheBreadmonkey Afternoon Ben 👋😊

You n me both!

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party avatar TheBreadmonkey , to random

I don't mean to alarm anyone but this is 100% a ghost and santa is the devil

Runaway reindeer sparks emergency rescue operation Image of the spirit of Rudolph the reindeer. A ghastly glowing apparition.
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MAJ1 ,
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@TheBreadmonkey Morning Ben 👋😊

See I knew Formby beach was haunted!

Used to go there on a semi regular basis when I still lived at my parents.

@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to random

& G’day Squirrel Fans, hope I find you bright eyed & bushy tailed!

'ello is this Tuesday workin, I've 'ad terrible trouble gettin it to start this mornin!

Well Mrs S is in the office today & I can't do anything much with the remedial work following the router move because I'm waiting on some pipe insulation. So having the day off!
A day of complete relaxation & resting my myriad aches & pains. I swear my bruises have bruises - I notice a decent sized one in my armpit this morning!
I might make the epic journey to the kettle & back now & then but that's it!

Cashew later Peeps, have a fabulously nutty day ! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

Picture a red squirrel hanging from a branch by its back legs close to the trunk of a tree. The caption reads “A case of the Tuesdays?” “HANG IN THERE!”
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MAJ1 OP ,
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@amiserabilist Evening Paul 👋😊

😆

Strangely enuf I was thinking that yesterday when I got into the shower & everything hurt!

I've always wondered about that - especially the scene in Last Crusade (I think) when he climbs out of the window when faced with a room full of students.

The problem with IT based roles is that there is little opportunity to go hunting for buried treasure!

MAJ1 OP ,
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@amiserabilist @Shelfie I've had a couple of NDE's & I share your aversion! Physical exercise very much depends on what, where & why.
For instance the chances of me emulating @TheBreadmonkey & running 8k without a Dobermann or a tiger chasing me are vanishingly small, however I will spend 8 hours straight climbing stairs, ladders, crawling into spaces that are just big enuf for me & out again & generally lugging, pulling & securing cables if there seems to be a decent excuse to do so!

Ordinarily though I like to maintain a high level of potential energy (ie sitting in my comfy chair) for those occasions when I need a burst of kinetic energy (like the last week or so.) .

Poor @Shelfie ! But then they do say one should share everything when one is in a relationship!

I heard about that - & yes me too! Hey ho the opportunities we miss!

Hope you both have a as nice an evening as possible & I hope Shell gets over your cold real soon! 🤗

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party avatar TheBreadmonkey , to random

It's a cold and frosty morning out there. Don't forget to moisturise, bitcheeeeeez. X

MAJ1 ,
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@TheBreadmonkey Morning Ben 👋😊

MAJ1 ,
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@TheBreadmonkey G’day Ben 👋😊

Yesterday was mad busy finishing off the cabling for the great router move of 2025!

Today has been a bit more relaxed, quick foraging trip to Costco™ this morning is now being followed by putting my feet up in front of the tv.

Hope your weekend is going well mate! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to random

Ok who broke the !

I’m away for the morning & I get back to find someone has pulled that big sod off cable out of the Cloudflare server! 🙄🤦‍♂️

Looking at the usual suspects here - you know who you are! 😆

MAJ1 OP ,
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@Soldusty I'll let you off, on the highly dubious grounds of total innocence! 😁

MAJ1 OP ,
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@Alice@beige.party avatar Alice , to random

I'm a big brat so I have my Mastodon posts auto-posting to Bluesky on an intentional 1–2 year delay and I particularly like it when the joke is from a format that was going around on some random day in 2023 so Bluesky will be like "did this person JUST learn about this style of joke?" while I’m sitting back thinking about how they're just watching my Mastodon reruns.

MAJ1 ,
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@Alice Cunning! Very cunning! 😆

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party avatar TheBreadmonkey , to random

It's so funny to me that literally any and all news about Fedi is framed

"What is this mysterious Fediverse - literally noone knows - we shall explain it to you in a way that is impenetrable"

They always start by talking about protocols and ActivityPub forks whilst I'm over here posting pictures of sexy carrots and the Pope doing sick skateboard tricks

MAJ1 ,
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@TheBreadmonkey Afternoon Ben 👋😊

Not to mention chatting with Armoured and sword wielding Squirrels with ambitions of world domination! 😆

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party avatar TheBreadmonkey , to random
Clandestine art by French artist James Colomina is on display in Amsterdam canals to criticize climate policy A red figure with red hair and red skin in red clothes lays face down in a canal, holding a sign that reads I'M FINE
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MAJ1 ,
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@TheBreadmonkey All the above (in my head! 😆 )

Mostly it's chilling out after yesterday's epic adventure in Merseyside!

Hope Sunday is treating you right mate!

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party avatar TheBreadmonkey , to random

Ai is simply not yet advanced enough to answer the real questions that need answering

(How much cauliflower cheese do I need to eat in the night to make me happy)

MAJ1 ,
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@TheBreadmonkey You need the Magratheans to build you a nice big super computer Ben!

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party avatar TheBreadmonkey , to random

Tried to do a lighthearted news morning then immediately got extremely sad. Do not read the news, people. No good can come of it. Something you don't see in the news is that somewhere on this crazy old rock, a load of people woke up full of peace and hope. Didn't have to face a bunch of horrors, yawned and stretched and made coffee and greeted the morning sun with a nice breakfast, and saw their loved ones and listened to music and were bathed in morning sunlight or listened warmly in thick jumpers to the calming rhythmic sound of rain against their window as they contemplated their day. Life is fucking delightful. Let that be in the news. News alert - some people fulfilled. Some people woke up, made love to their significant other, ate some sausages then went back to bed and read all day. Some people took a walk in the crisp autumnal morning light. Stick that in your pipe journo's.

MAJ1 ,
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@TheBreadmonkey Morning Ben 👋😊

This is an excellent news report, much better than the beeb!

😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to random

& G’day Squirrel Fans, hope I find you bright eyed & bushy tailed!

To quote Douglas Adams : "It must be Thursday, I never could quite get the hang of Thursdays!"

It's a sunny start here in deepest, darkest Yorkshire but we have rain forecast for later in the day.

Ok my spine presented me with the bill for all that rummaging under the desk sorting cables out last night & it's nearly an arm & a leg! I think a slow day is in order!

Cashew later Peeps, have a fabulously nutty day ! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

Picture a small red squirrel with their nose poking out of their drey. The caption reads: “When you wake up thinking it’s Friday… Then find out it’s only Thursday! ” CREDIT: DDG find
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@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to random

& G’day Squirrel Fans, hope I find you bright eyed & bushy tailed!

This is your official Tuesday announcement - it is officially Tuesday as certified by the Squirrel Horologist Association!

It's a sunny start to the day but showers are forecast later, with temps due to hit a high of 12ºC.

I maybe a teeny, tiny bit excited that my Mac Mini is due later!

Cashew later Peeps, have a fabulously nutty day ! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

Picture a red squirrel standing upright on the top of a wooden fence, arms thrown wide & looking all excited. The caption reads "I'M SO EXCITED...AND I JUST CAN'T HIDE IT!" Credit: quickmeme com
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@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party avatar TheBreadmonkey , to random

I really enjoyed House of Dynamite and am looking forward to the second film

MAJ1 ,
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@TheBreadmonkey Evening Ben 👋😊

Good to hear - it's our watchlist!

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party avatar TheBreadmonkey , to random

Not saying I've eaten a surprising amount of food for dinner, but a heavily armed squad of shady government types just smashed through the skylight, rappelling from a low-flying helicopter with sweeping searchlights, put a bag over my head, abducting me under the cover of darkness, flew us far out across the vast empty erg of the Kent desert, bundled me into an underground bunker which simply had a large painted '5 1' stencilled on the top, and I'm now in a dimly lit room filled with all sorts of strange scientific equipment and people milling about in lab coats and while an elite squad of highly trained soldiers nervously point their automatic weapons at me, an army guy with an impressive clipped moustache and a chest full of medals keeps shouting at me "WHY HAVE YOU COME TO OUR PLANET WHAT DO YOU WANT". Bit weird.

MAJ1 ,
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@TheBreadmonkey Thanks Ben 😊

@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to random

& G’day Squirrel Fans, hope I find you bright eyed & bushy tailed!

So I haven't the first clue what day it is - Day of the Triffids for all I know!

Minimal sleep last night & lots of codeine so brain is somewhere on Mars at the moment.

Right gotta go do some laundry because chores wait for no skwerl!

I will catch up with everyone when I can corner my thoughts & herd them into their pen!

Cashew later Peeps, have a fabulously nutty day ! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

Picture a close up of a squirrel standing facing us with a sunlit wood in the background. The caption reads: "I came, I saw, I forgot what I was doing, retraced my steps and got distracted on my way back. I have no idea what's going on and now I have to pee." Credit: DDG find.
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@stux@mstdn.social avatar stux , to random
MAJ1 ,
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@stux @BreakingImpossible That is brilliant!! 👌😂

@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to random

& G’day Squirrel Fans, hope I find you bright eyed & bushy tailed!

Saturday, having chased after the rest of the week, is looking somewhat the worse for wear & has collapsed on the sofa & demanded coffee!

A dull & cooler day here in deepest, darkest Yorkshire, with a lot of rain in the forecast - in fact we have a yellow rain warning ... or should that be a yellow warning for rain? 🤔🤭

Mrs S has gone out to see her mum so peace reigns!

No real plans for today, we'll see what the day brings!

Cashew later Peeps, have a fabulously nutty day ! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

Picture a red squirrel standing upright on a wooden bench his white belly fully visible as he reaches to the sky as if in celebration! The caption reads: “Today is Saturday” Credit: DDG find
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@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to weirdfolks group

Good evening Squirrel Fans.

Apropos to nothing at all 😇 ...

Rincewind the Wizzard (his spelling not mine!) has been illegally immigrated into the Agatean Empire for reasons that may (or may not) become clear if you read the book. (Interesting Times).
Currently he is before the Agatean Emperor & his Grand Vizier, Lord Hong. The outlook does not look good! :-

"Tell me, Lord . . . Hong,” said the ancient Emperor. “What would be the punishment for a . . . foreigner . . . entering the Forbidden City?” “Removal of all limbs, ears, and eyes, and then allowed to go free,” said Lord Hong. Rincewind raised his hand. “First offense?” he said.”
― Terry Pratchett, Interesting Times

Right off to meet a sleeper agent in Night City, catch you fab folk tomorrow!

Wherever you are, whatever you are doing, I hope you’re well & safe! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

@weirdfolks

For today’s diary update please follow

Picture a squirrel with a hat pulled right down & wearing a white overcoat - dressed like a spy.. Credit: DDG find.
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@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to weirdfolks group

& G’day Squirrel Fans, hope I find you bright eyed & bushy tailed!

Friday has arrived bouncing with excitement like a kid on Christmas Eve in anticipation of the weekend.

I've done my chores & had breakfast, just sippin my coffee while I build the energy & motivation to go & see if this overbox fits without a fight.

At least it's a nice day, its lovely and sunny here in deepest, darkest Yorkshire with highs of around 18ºC and scattered showers.

Cashew later Peeps, have a fabulously nutty day ! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

weirdfolks@a.gup.pe icon weirdfolks group

Picture a squirrel peering through the bars of a wooden fence. The caption reads: “Hello Friday, I can almost see the weekend! ”
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MAJ1 OP ,
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@DoubleTreble weirdfolks@a.gup.pe icon weirdfolks group Thank you 🙏 🤗🥰

MAJ1 OP ,
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@ravensrod weirdfolks@a.gup.pe icon weirdfolks group Morning Raven my friend 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

MAJ1 OP ,
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@Lstn2urmama weirdfolks@a.gup.pe icon weirdfolks group Hey Ros 🤗🥰

Sleep well & feel better Sweetie! 🫂

@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to weirdfolks group

Good evening Squirrel Fans.

Sometimes I pick a quote for this epilogue simply for the artistry of it - pTerry's wordsmithing at its best! :-

“It was a dark night, the kind of darkness which is not simply explainable by absence of moon or stars, but the darkness that appears to flow in from somewhere else – so thick and tangible that maybe you could snatch a handful of air and squeeze the night out of it.”
― Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies

Right, it has been a long & trying day & tomorrow promises to be equally long & trying - I bet my lunch that the overbox for my MiL's meter cupboard will fit straight out of the box! So I'm off to bed, I shall hopefully find a movie to watch.

Wherever you are, whatever you are doing, I hope you’re well & safe! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖 weirdfolks@a.gup.pe icon weirdfolks group

For today’s diary update please follow

Picture a squirrel asleep on its back on a blue beret on the dashboard of a car. The caption reads “I GET TIRED FROM JUST THINKING OF EVERYTHING I HAVE TO DO.” Credit: DDG find
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MAJ1 OP ,
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@Theosuwb weirdfolks@a.gup.pe icon weirdfolks group G’day Theo 👋😊

Hope Friday treats you well when you catch up with us! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to weirdfolks group

So out & about, just dropped Mrs S off at the hospital & spent a merry 15 minutes looking for a parking space.

Mrs S wants to go to Costco™ while we’re out. Joy!

⌨️📴 Try not to break the interweb while I’m away 😁😜😁 weirdfolks@a.gup.pe icon weirdfolks group

MAJ1 OP ,
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@Alison weirdfolks@a.gup.pe icon weirdfolks group Morning Ali 🤗🥰

We do sometimes, not today though there’s a couple of meals defrosting in the fridge for tea & we may be going out Saturday.

There may be some naughty treats though!

Hope you have a good day! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

MAJ1 OP ,
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@Lstn2urmama weirdfolks@a.gup.pe icon weirdfolks group Yes I used to like going shopping when I was on shifts - like you say so much easier when everyone else is in work!

I really don't like crowds these days but I do like to make sure that fresh produce especially is ok.

Not been to a concert or anywhere for the longest time.

MAJ1 OP ,
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@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to weirdfolks group

& G’day Squirrel Fans, hope I find you bright eyed & bushy tailed!

Thursday has been a bit mean to me, because I didn't get up at crack of sparrows fart it turned the power off just as I got into the kitchen & kept it off for 30 minutes!
Hats off to the Northern Powergrid engineer who fixed the fault well within the specified repair window we got though!

Not a lot on today, although I do have to take Mrs S to the hospital for an appointment later - nothing serious thankfully.

Cashew later Peeps, have a fabulously nutty day ! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

weirdfolks@a.gup.pe icon weirdfolks group

Picture a grey squirrel laid exhausted across the cut branch of a tree, the caption reads: “Hang on in there … the week is almost over”
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MAJ1 OP ,
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MAJ1 OP ,
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@oldrawgabbit weirdfolks@a.gup.pe icon weirdfolks group You better believe they do! 🤣

MAJ1 OP ,
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@blingoali weirdfolks@a.gup.pe icon weirdfolks group Evening BA 👋😊

Bugger!

Timing is all - glad the water is back on & I wish you the best of luck with the heat pump when you get it!

@MAJ1@beige.party avatar MAJ1 , to weirdfolks group

& G’day Squirrel Fans, hope I find you bright eyed & bushy tailed!

Thursday has arrived looking damp & a bit ruffled.

Here’s hoping today is the day that yon washing machine engineer turns up - lets just say that he won’t be getting a good review or recommendation unless he can come up with a really good excuse!

Another day of hiding away is on the cards here in deepest, darkest Yorkshire.

Cashew later Peeps, have a fabulously nutty day ! 😊🫶:party_major_squirrel:🖖

@weirdfolks

Picture a squirrel sitting on a tiny bench in a park, holding a cup of coffee. Above the squirrel the text “They said “Do what you love.” At the bottom of the frame the text: “So here I m, drinking coffee and avoiding humans” CREDIT: DDG find.
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MAJ1 OP ,
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@zendao42 weirdfolks@a.gup.pe icon weirdfolks group G’day 👋😊

Crumbs that's no good!

I hope that the spark can sort it out swiftly!