captainlezbian

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captainlezbian ,

I can be trusted with this, I promise

captainlezbian ,

As a woman very involved in the lifestyle scene (as opposed to the professional scene). Yeah, there's a lot of reasons people wind up into it, and what your friend describes is the cliche stereotype of the person who pays for pros, but a lot of the lifestylers are similar to a lesser degree.

And yeah it's not a given that you're even allowed to have sexual release in a kink event, and sometimes it has to be in a specific room. The sensations, the mind games, the role play, the pain, etc. is often the primary thing happening to the exclusion of other stuff. A surprising amount of bdsm events are just discussion groups and classes.

captainlezbian ,

It's definitely skewed towards neurodivergent people, but not exclusively.

Lots of trauma on both sides of the slash (ie both in dominants and submissives). Reenacting a variant of how it felt to be bullied or yelled at/hit by your parents or even so far as reenacting sexual violence done to you within a safe space where you can end it at any time is remarkably healing, and it's easy to from there just fall in love with all of it. And on the dominant side that can be a form of taking control back in your life. A friend of mine got into being a Domme at her second husband's request, but she fell in love with it because it returned to her the feeling of control that her abusive first husband had stolen from her.

Sensory seeking behaviors are super common in the bondage scene and the sadomasochism scene.

For people with social difficulties the extent to which everything is negotiated and clearly communicated is really refreshing, and then since there's so much neurodivergence things like flat affects, saying stupid shit without thinking, etc is generally understood and not mistreated.

There's also just generally a hippie/weirdo/alternative vibe to the community. You'll meet reiki practitioners and you'll see arguments over whether fire cupping actually does anything besides bruising the hell out of a back by people who do it for fun and generally agree that bruising the hell out of a back can make it feel better outside the bruising because of endorphins and distraction. Oh also a hell of a lot of nonmonogamy.

I'm sure there's more if I think of it. Ultimately, you have to be a bit weird to take the moves from "i think this is hot in theory or in erotica" or "we do this in our bedroom" to "I'm interested in going to a discussion group/class/social event/play party about this in person where I live". The first event is terrifying to actually walk into. And then it's another big step to actually go to enough that people remember who you are or to get involved in a more community focused side of the scene like the leather community

captainlezbian ,

I try, fortunately I believe making the world weirder makes it better

captainlezbian ,

That would literally save lives

captainlezbian ,

"We shipped billions of dollars of products to them free of charge and they dare not thank us"

captainlezbian ,

Idk the Collyridians had a point. The Melchisedechians were on some wild shit. But in general trinitarian heresies are arguing over the weeds

captainlezbian , (edited )

Just wait a few years and their house will be downstream in a different neighborhood

captainlezbian ,

My wife does not address me as captain

We both address each other as wife, reveling in the ambiguity

captainlezbian ,

As an American I've long supported assisting rebels, but going to war is just as likely to backfire as it is to succeed.

captainlezbian ,

It feels very reminiscent of "well don't dress like that then"

captainlezbian ,

This one but in the now/future. Basically a lot of money was printed to pay for things but in order to not cause inflation we had to create debt to destroy that money in the future.

sample size

There is an image of a blonde girl making a displeased face at a 5.0 star rating derived from 19 individuals' ratings, next to that same blonde girl making an approving expression at a 4.6 star rating derived from 2,280 individuals' ratings. @justsomerandomgaynerd on Tumblr adds "#...i think thid meme demonstrated the importance of sample size better and more efficiently than any science class I have ever taken"
ALT
captainlezbian ,

Yeah a 10/10 for an oil change would be something like they fixed a problem free of charge since they were already in there. A 9 is "great price and surprisingly fast"

Realistcly how much can be cleaned out of a house, as a child of a hourder?

So this is kinda of a follow up from one of my older posts, but you can say im a child of a hoarding family but some of its my fault aswell. My mother believes we dont need an external help and that i can do it by myself as if its my problem, which bugs me and demotivated me knowing how lazy and annoying m family is. ...

captainlezbian ,

Yeah as someone who hoarded at a worse stage of her life and struggles with it still, the piles felt like safety and security, but they also felt overwhelming and unassailable. You have to deal with the mental health issues and nonjudgementally get the person to be ok with the cleaning bit by bit. To this day big cleans are mentally and emotionally exhausting for me, it's just that I find messes to be also extremely stressful.

hello Fediverse! how do neurodivergent peeps get jobs?

Is there a position available anywhere in the world where I can simply take an assessment to identify my skills and capabilities, receive assignments accordingly, complete them remotely, and submit them without the need for ongoing communication or visits? I prefer a role that allows for flexible, independent work hours. ...

captainlezbian ,

Or engineering or nursing

captainlezbian ,

That's fair, I've just noticed that a lot of the ADHD women I know are nurses

captainlezbian ,

Full faith and credit never stopped the refusal of some states to recognize other states' gay marriages. It should have but didn't

captainlezbian ,

Yeah that's straight up an attempt to relegalize segregation

captainlezbian ,

That's fair, i just suspect that that element won't be upheld and am still bitter that it wasn't then

captainlezbian ,

Yep, and that's why it's not just stuff like this, but also stuff like them being gay, or Alex Jones watching trans porn, or boebert getting caught giving a handy at a play.

captainlezbian ,

The Shepherds Crown will get you, but it's one of his best books

captainlezbian ,

Yeah it sure would be nice if immigrants were treated like people with rights instead of problems to be managed

captainlezbian ,

That's not even biblical. Israel has never controlled fucking Tehran, and they were routinely in exile in Iraq and Syria, not as conquerors but as conquered. No fuccabee only believes this because he's pro genocide, anti brown people, and hates Muslims more than jews.

captainlezbian ,

Turns out he thinks the Zulus hold an inalienable right to the whole of Myanmar /s

captainlezbian ,

Yeah it's only with grapes that they really captured the best part

captainlezbian ,

So I may only love it because it was my mom's favorite flavor so I have good memories of being a kid and picking grape stuff to share with her. But yeah I love the flavor. It's definitely one of the more divisive of the popular artificial flavors though.

I can't comment on it tasting like a soviet urinal, I'm not quite kinky enough to know how that tastes.

captainlezbian ,

I wouldn't know I've never done enough psychedelics to experience synesthesia. And idk if I can, I suspect the I would go away before tasting colors starts from my experience

captainlezbian ,

Idk I've known married couples that preferred to live far apart or other married couples who were casual partners but needed marital benefits

captainlezbian ,

The Midwest ends somewhere around poland/the northern Baltics in that map, I was under the impression that those areas have been freaked out.

captainlezbian ,

So when am I getting my back pay from the CIA?

captainlezbian ,

Yeah the transappalachian great lakes region and the great plains. The real question is is west Pennsylvania midwestern

captainlezbian ,

That's absolutely my experience with the kink community. We do love a board game night

captainlezbian ,

Maybe in the sense of this song

captainlezbian ,

The GDR's is exactly what I would expect out of German communism. "We have the two working classes: laborers and engineers"

captainlezbian ,

We killed the predators on a lot of our continent. Deer hunting is ecologically necessary here. And thats before we get into the boar problem

captainlezbian ,

Yes, and you all understand just how controversial it is to do as well, considering that reintroducing predators is something people are trying on both our continents. Reintroducing wolves to the forests of the eastern united states may happen in my lifetime but is unlikely as the people who live where they would be enjoy hunting for meat and don't like the idea of having to shoot wolves that get too bold. They're currently controversially being reintroduced in the West like near Yellowstone. Other predators like cougars also need to be allowed to populate more. Even then though, nothing on this continent but humans is taking down boars. They're giant and massively invasive, an ecological calamity.

But for the time being, hunters should be switching to lead free shot, and they should continue hunting white tail deer. Target shooters should also be using lead free shot, in general if you don't want particles of it in your bloodstream don't shoot with it.

captainlezbian , (edited )

Yeah the better option is for a multi state compact for a public option. I know Washington has a bit of a public option. That said, you get no subsidies if your employer offers minimum contributions to the health insurance of their choosing.

Edit to finish the thought: we need universal single payer, but barring that we need public options and real choice, including choice over where to apply our employer's contributions. It wouldn't fix everything that universal single payer would, but it would enable you to have the freedom to not need to change doctors every time you get a new job.

captainlezbian ,

Listen, I think we're as barbaric about this as any reasonable person, but we really aren't unique. Mexico, Egypt, and the Philippines aren't doing so great, but they're all modern nations with modern infrastructure in their urban areas. India has even worse health insurance than the US and while yes they're still building out their plumbing systems, Mumbai and New Delhi are modern megapolises.

captainlezbian ,

And this is embraced because profit is capped to a percentage of payouts

captainlezbian ,

Yes, it's a for profit business that makes it's profit off of trying to have the most accurate odds they can. They charge you slightly more than they expect to lose on you (the house edge) and then they're betting on every roll of the dice. That's exactly how casinos earn money (though casinos try to compete on experience and payout, while insurance competes on price and payout).

The difference is that the casino is attempting to take advantage of your greed and wants you to stay there and bet everything you have. Meanwhile the insurer is selling relief from fear of financial ruin and is asking you to make scheduled bets that you want to lose every month. American health insurance has massive issues and should be replaced with something akin to the NHS before it was defunded, but nobody is losing their shirt buying homeowners insurance unless the area they live in is now being pummeled by the climate crisis like southern California or the gulf of Mexico.

Would government run insurance be better? Yeah probably. But in the era before modern insurance a major part of the draw of fraternal organizations was that they served that role.

captainlezbian ,

Yes, we're a profoundly broken country in how we use our wealth. But you were over here acting like no other country that isnt entirely and devastatingly impoverished is failing it's citizens this way, and I'm pointing out that no, once again we fall in line with developing nations rather than developed ones. And for those of us who wish for it to be a functional country, I think my framing is much more useful.

And i apologize for assuming you're a European who knows nothing of anywhere beyond the Eurosphere and assumes developing nations don't even have running water.

captainlezbian ,

You want Bluetooth? You get a cassette adapter for it like intended

captainlezbian ,

Nope I'd sleep in jeans sometimes if my wife didn't hate it

captainlezbian ,

Also every bit helps. I struggle to maintain full femme voice, but I went from extremely deep (ie would out anyone) to androgynous for the most part

captainlezbian ,

I'm surprised cervical is up, the hpv vaccine was supposed to do a number on that one

captainlezbian ,

The convent likely belongs to an outside group that exerts control over it. There were crackdowns in the middle ages on convents because some tried to turn into lesbian communes with Jesus.

captainlezbian ,

That's fair, I see it more as civic conscription, but I absolutely think that there needs to be more compensation or other support such as forcing your landlord or bank to scratch the costs of housing for days you're on jury duty. Police can afford mraps, parole is set to ensure no bed in a prison goes empty, no prison ever closes nor cop's overtime denied, and yet we can't find the money to compensate indigent juries or to pay for public defenders. But at the same time I'm one of the jury system's greatest defenders because it's one of the few checks on government tyranny we still have.

captainlezbian ,

That's me. It's simple. You live a cheap life with a good career