Body Language & Emotional Intelligence: Negotiation

Showing posts with label Negotiation. Show all posts

Saturday, June 25, 2016

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3599: The Brexit, David Cameron announces his Resignation, Protection and Body Language (VIDEO, PHOTOS)

On Thursday the citizens of the United Kingdom voted to leave the European Union. The final Brexit voting tallied at about 51.9% to leave the EU, while 48.1% voted to remain.

Yesterday David Cameron gave a speech outside of Number Ten, where, among other subjects, he announced his intention to resign from his position of Prime Minister.

From a nonverbal communication perspective, there were several very significant tells. The one discussed here is particularly illustrative.

Beginning at 1:25 in the video above, Cameron continues saying, "This will need to involve the full engagement of the Scottish, Welsh and Northern Ireland governments to ensure that the interests of all parts of our United Kingdom are protected and advanced ..."

During 1:35 - 1:36, as he says, "... are protected ...", he initiates a buttoning of his suite jacket. In this moment his body language behavior was highly congruent with his verbal language. He very much desires to protect the UK (and himself) - and the buttoning of his jack demonstrates his own beta behavior and the desire to be protected.

Of course if you're outside and it's cold, the issue is temperature - however this is rarely the case.

One time you NEVER should attempt a crucial part of a negotiation, try to close a sale or ask for something important - is just after the person with whom you're speaking buttons (or zips or pulls together) their jacket - for they have just metaphorically donned their armor.

See also:

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3598: Gary Johnson, Donald Trump's Wall and Body Language

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3594: Vladimir Putin, Donald Trump and Fareed Zakaria

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3584: Brock Turner's Mugshot, Duping Delight and Body Language

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3580: Muhammad Ali, Donald Trump, Repulsion and Body Language

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3578: Megan Fox, Body Language and Dismissive Emotions

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3538: Barack Obama, David Cameron, Number 10 and the Brexit

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 2433: Vladimir Putin & David Cameron Disagree on Syria - A Body Language Evaluation of Russian Leader

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 2409: David Cameron & François Hollande - Variations on the Hand Chop & Palm Orientation

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Thursday, December 3, 2015

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3392: Donald Trump to Republican Jewish Coalition - Body Language (VIDEO, PHOTOS)

You may have heard of Donald Trump's multiple faux pas (many have called it anti-Semitic) during his speech to the Republican Jewish Coalition earlier today. During the above excerpt, the businessman-turned-politician shows us yet another profound body language tell (Watch the full speech here).

Trumps exemplifies a classic "Rationalization Rapport Empathy Expression" (aka R2E2) during the 0:22 segment of the above video, as he says, "... couple ..." ("... It's okay - Yeah, I've been called on that a couple of times too ...").

The R2E2 is a nonverbal signal which may manifest very briefly (as a microexpression or near microexpression) but also for longer duration facial displays (in this example it last for about 0.25 seconds). The vast majority of body language beginners will invariably confuse this with and falsely lump the R2E2 together with that of disgust - however they have completely different meanings (How do you differentiate between these two very similar expressions?).

It's important to stress that every single emotionally-healthy person makes the R2E2 expression once in a while, however when it IS seen, and particularly when it's seen frequently, you should always make the following distinctions:

Does the person believe what they, themselves are saying?
What's the over-all feeling of sincerity (Sincerity Quotient) in this moment?
What do I feel is their predominant emotion in this moment?
What is my gut feeling of this person's motive(s) in this moment?
Why are they putting an extra effort in trying to convince me of something?
What, specifically, are they trying to convince me of?
Are they feigning a baring of their "Achilles Heel" and if so, what is it? Why?

Although it's not the case 100% of the time, very often those displaying the R2E2 are trying to rationalize. Moreover much of the time they're trying to convince you of something too - along with their psyche. They very much want you to be a "Co-Rationalizer". Tread carefully when you see the R2E2 - for it's very often used when people are trying too hard to gain your trust, rapport and empathy.

Remember - every human being uses the R2E2 on occasion. Professionals who tend to use the Rationalization Rapport Empathy Expression excessively include: physicians, sales professionals, politicians, reporters, law enforcement and attorneys.

Rationalization Rapport Empathy Expression (R2E2) captured during 0:22

Close-up of above R2E2

See also:

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3391: Tense Exchange Between Mike Allen and Chicago Mayor Emanuel - Body Language

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3336: Donald Trump, Kevin McCarthy, Deception and Body Language

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3326: Donald Trump on 60 Minutes - Body Language Tells

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3293: Why is Donald Trump a Better Liar than Most Politicians? - Body Language

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3250: Donald Trump regarding John McCain: "He's no hero" - Body Language Tells us what he really thinks

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3247: Barack Obama's Response to Question regarding Revoking Bill Cosby's Presidential Medal of Freedom - Body Language Tells

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3263: Barack Obama on Jon Stewart's "The Daily Show" - The Sarcastic Bobble Body Language

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 2748: Tatia Pilieva's Brilliant Video "First Kiss" - Body Language of Romance and Affection

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Friday, July 31, 2015

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3263: Barack Obama on Jon Stewart's "The Daily Show" - The Sarcastic Bobble Body Language (VIDEO, PHOTOS)

The Daily Show
Get More: Daily Show Full Episodes,The Daily Show on Facebook,Daily Show Video Archive

President Obama appeared on The Daily Show last week. Of course there was a multitude of body language signals displayed by both men. However one displayed by Barack Obama when Jon Stewart asked about the Nuclear Arms Agreement with Iran - is very revealing, fairly common and yet rarely discussed.

Beginning at 7:21, Mr. Obama continues, ".... and when you hear the critics talk about, 'Well, it's a bad deal, we coulda, coulda got a better deal', you then ask them, 'Well what represents a better deal? What is it that you think, ah, could happen?' Typically they're vague and the fall back on, 'Well, if you'd, ah, beat your chest a little bit more and [pauses] .....' "

When he says, ".... more and ..... (and during a bit of the pause afterwards), we see Mr. Obama's whole torso oscillate back and forth. Though to some this may look like an example of a "Self-Righteous Head Wiggle" (SRHW) - it's not. This is its nonverbal cousin known as a "Sarcastic Bobble" - which has similar but important physical and emotional distinctions. The Sarcastic Bobble involves primarily the torso (although of course, there is a secondary head movement) - in contrast to the SRHW which usually (although not always) is primarily a head-neck phenomena (see links below). In addition, the SRHW is typically expressed with a more rapid movement (higher frequency) vs. the Sarcastic Bobble.

The Sarcastic Bobble, as its name suggests, is a sardonic body language expression which mocks another person or group. In this context, Mr. Obama is belittling many in the American Republican Party - who oppose the Iran Nuclear Arms deal. To nuance this further, the Sarcastic Bobble is usually seen when mocking: hubris, naïveté, over-simplification, inexperience or lack of insight. It's important to note, this illustrator is, of course, SUBJECTIVE with respect to the person expressing it. Not surprisingly, the Sarcastic Bobble is not rapport-building, but rapport-destroying. It should essentially never be used during negotiation or when trying to build coalition - except perhaps to point out opinions regarding a third party who is not present.

This behavior cannot be accurately captured in a still image - please view the video to appreciate it in a dynamic context.

See also:

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3262: Donald Trump, Breast Pumping and Donald's "That's Disgusting"

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 2506: Barack Obama, the Self-Righteous Head Wiggle and Retaliation Against Syrian Poison Gas Attack

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 2561: President Obama's Self-Righteous Jaw Wiggle

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 1923: Hillary Clinton's Body Language re: Syrian Government - The Self-Righteous Head Wiggle

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 2982: Politicians Should Never Do This If They Want To Be Elected - Hillary Clinton's Body Language Faux Pas Body Language

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3169: Baltimore Deputy Police Commissioner Jerry Rodriguez regarding the Death of Freddie Gray

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 3141: Carly Fiorina "Higher than 90%" Chances She's Running for President

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Saturday, January 11, 2014

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 2677: Jay Carney's Beard - Body Language Tells (VIDEO, PHOTO)

The last U.S. President to be elected with any facial hair was William Howard Taft in 1908. Taft - that was 106 years ago. The higher on the political ladder a man climbs, the less chance a he has being elected to office. Worldwide the percentage of men with facial hair is 50%. In the U.S. and Europe it is 33%. Since the advent and widespread proliferation of photography, the percentage of men with facial hair has dropped. Pre-verbal children overwhelmingly prefer clean shaven men over those with facial hair - even if their father or other male guardian has a mustache, beard or goatee. Human beings are hard wired with this biological bias. All things being equal, those without facial hair are interpreted as more sincere.

When trust, negotiation, rapport or sincerity is a key element of any human relationship, statistically a man has a significantly better chance if he is clean shaven. And while there are always individual exceptions, statistics describe the behavior of large numbers. Other than the President, Jay Carney or any press secretary is the most visible member of any administration - thus any male press secretary should NEVER sport facial hair.

See also:

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2200: President Obama growing a Mustache? - Body Language and Facial Hair

Nonverbal Communication Secret # 1697: Facial Hair, Politics and Athletes Phil Humber Pitches a Perfect Game

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 2582: Jay Carney Dismisses (and is Embarrassed by) Low Obamacare Enrollment Numbers

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 2524: Jay Carney, Navy Yard Shooting and "The New Normal" Emotion and Thought Disparity of the Exaggerated Pout

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2228: Jay Carney's Body Language - Contempt disguised as a Sniff .... for Republicans' Solutions to the Fiscal Cliff

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 2676: Nancy Pelosi, Chris Christie, Bling and a Handkerchief

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 2674: Did Chris Christie Orchestrate Bridge Closure or Cover Up His Subordinates Actions? Body Language Tells Us ...

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Sunday, September 29, 2013

Nonverbal Communication Analysis No. 2539: Calvin Johnson, the Index Finger and Alpha Behavior - A Body Language Tell of Mobile Phones (PHOTO)

Calvin Johnson is of the best wide receivers to ever play the game of American Professional Football. In 2012 he set a record for single season receiving yards eclipsing the great Jerry Rice. Earlier that same year he signed an eight year, $132 million contract extension with the Detroit Lions - one of the World's most lucrative.

In the image above Johnson is seen speaking on a mobile phone - a setting in which a lot of key body language tells can be gleaned. As a conversation changes throughout the duration of a phone call, it is extremely useful to monitor the relative alpha-to-beta flux throughout the call.

There are many nonverbal signals which will point the way here - one of which is the position of the index finger (aka forefinger) and is particularly more prominent in men. When it is extended and alone, along the back of the cell phone (in contrast to the other fingers flexed and on the phone's side as Calvin Johnson is shown in this photo) - it is a considerable alpha signal. Subsequently it often will be seen flexing - and joining the other fingers when the context of the phone call takes on a more beta/bad news/submissive emotional tone. Later, when once again a more dominant or joyful context takes a more prominent role, the forefinger will then re-extend. This nonverbal tell is an extremely reliable signal and yields golden insight within any type of negotiation or sales setting.

Happy birthday Calvin. Good luck against the Bears.

See also:

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2277: Diane O'Meara, Lennay Kekua, Ronaiah Tuiasosopo & Manti Te'o - O'Meara's Body Language - Part I

Negotiation Nonverbal Communication Secret # 1163: A Body Language Cheat Sheet - Mobile Phone Tells

Negotiation and Dating Secret # 111: Another Great Phone Tell

Negotiation Body Language Secret # 341: Narcissism, Parking and Cell Phones

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2035: Mitt Romney's Body Language Amplifier - (it works on the rest of us too)

Negotiation Body Language Secret # 179: Loss of Inhibitions on Phone - Nicolas Sarkozy

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 1921: Who was More Dominant - Tom Cruise or Katie Holmes?

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2263: A.J. McCarron's Body Language as hears about his Girl Friend's (Katherine Webb's) new found Twitter Popularity

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Sunday, February 3, 2013

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 4949:
Colin Kaepernick's Body Language of
Clandestine Disagreement at Press Conference

In a press conference last Sunday, Colin Kaeperneck displayed a great example of some subtle body language. Although there are other nonverbals captured in the above image (e.g. mild anger), the San Francisco Quarterback sensation is showcasing an excellent example of a subtle lip purse. When a person's mouth opening morphs into a lip purse, they are nearly always voicing very little to no disagreement - yet if you can spot this key nonverbal, you'll know that their true differences are sizable. Moreover, betas never make this expression - only alphas or those who believe they are alphas relative to with whomever they are speaking or interacting (they of course may be betas in a different group). You can be sure they have a plan they're not sharing with you, and they believe they have the power, the resources and the intention to execute it.

In this moment, Kaepernick doesn't like what he's hearing. His body language is screaming clandestine disagreement. If you see this during a sale, in a negotiation, the boardroom, the courtroom, in depositions, or voir dire - you better have a strong plan B. Your adversary is about to attack your flank.

Don't bet against Colin Kaepernick.

See also:

Negotiation Nonverbal Communication Secret # 1055: The Subtle Lip Purse

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2072: Jay Carney's Lip Purse while NOT commenting on Mitt Romney's Visits to the U.K., Israel and Poland

Nonverbal Communications Analysis # 1715: Jay Carney's Lip Purse Bin Laden is Dead & General Motors is Alive

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 1896: IMF Managing Director - Christine Lagarde Pseudo-Prayer & Pursed Lips

Negotiation Secret # 9: Nancy Pelosi's Lip Purse

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2216: Senator Jim DeMint's Body Language - Lip Purse, Suppressed Smile, Duping Delight & Retiring Early

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2265: Ryan Gosling pulls a woman from audience on Conan - His Classic Body Language Tell

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2130: Mahmoud Ahmadinejad on Helping Syria - Interview with Charlie Rose and Norah O'Donnell

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2088: McKayla Maroney's Expression - Everyone Got it Wrong 2012 Olympic Vault Silver Medalist

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Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2212:
Barack Obama warns Bashar al-Assad,
A Body Language Signal of Conviction

Bashar al-Assad has recently directed the moving and mixing of chemical weapons in what is apparently a readying for their use. President Obama, NATO's Secretary-General, Anders Fogh Rasmussen and other leaders, have warned the Syrian President against using these weapons of mass destruction. During the 0:18 - 0:23 segment of the above video, as Barack Obama says, ".... I want to make it absolutely clear to Assad and those under his command ...." and again when saying, ".... if you make the tragic mistake of using these weapons ...." (0:33 - 0:36), he can be seen using the "Finger-up" nonverbal illustrator when warning al-Assad. The use of this specific body language is a very reliable indicator that its user (here Obama) has a high level of conviction and belief to his words. In all settings, when this body language gesture is seen - know that its user means action. This is not an empty threat.

See also:

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2138: President Obama's Anger During Debate - An Under-Appreciated Body Language Signal

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 1859: Prince William is Angry at the Queen's Jubilee

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2041: Michelle and Barack Obama, Open Consideration, Tolerance "Smile" and Contempt

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2190: President Obama's Body Language - Press Conference 14 October 2012 - Defense of Ambassador Susan Rice

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2168: John Sununu's Comments regarding Colin Powell's Endorsement of Barack Obama - Anger, Anxiety and Contempt

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2152: Second Presidential Debate - 16 October 2012 - Barack Obama's Duping Delight - Benghazi, Libya Attack was an "Act of Terror" - Alpha, Beta, Confidence & Acquiescence ...

Negotiation Body Language Secret # 813: Ask Osama Bin Laden about Appeasement

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2167: Colin Powell Endorses President Obama - Body Language Display of Anxiety, Contempt & the Self-Righteous Head Wiggle

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Saturday, November 17, 2012

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2193:
Keira Knightley interview re: "Anna Karenina" -
Body Language of "R2E2" Facial Expression

The beautiful Keira Knightley is interviewed in this promo for her starring role in the recent rendition of Tolstoy's "Anna Karenina". Here she displays in a very brief display (a microexpression) - of a "Rationalization-Rapport-Empathy Expression" (R2E2).

At the 1:13 mark when Keira says the word "don't" the talented actress displays the Rationalization Rapport Empathy Expression.

To the untrained observer, the R2E2 can look very similar to the disgust nonverbal expression - although it's meaning here is of course, completely different. As a highly context body language, it's used during speech when the speaker is trying to rationalize and/or wants the listener to co-rationalize in their opinion, action, behavior, etc. Empathy and rapport are thus also being sought at these moments. As is the case with 99.9% of nonverbal communication, the R2E2 is initiated subconsciously - and everyone displays this expression.

A paralanguage correlation is important to note here - for there often is an coexisting higher pitch and increased rate of speech during the R2E2. It is also common for there to be a false or forced laughter and a leaning forward. Often there is a touching of the person who is being spoken to - or an abbreviated similar gesture of reaching toward them. These additional paralanguage and nonverbal actions serve as amplifiers and anchors in the effort to gain rapport, empathy and co-rationalization.

When you see the R2E2 displayed, it's a signal that the speaker/displayer believes that you (or they) are not yet fully convinced of their idea, plan, actions - so they are trying to "co-rationalize"- as if you, at least regarding the particular issue, are of one mind. It is an extremely common expression to see in professional sales, negotiations and in romance. Regardless - you are being wooed.

See also:

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 1143: Santorum Video Analysis - R2E2 and other Tells

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 1732: Rationalization, Rapport, Empathy Expression - How Jewel got her name

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 705: R2E2, Pseudo-Smiles and Bonding Beguiles

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 335: Keira Knightley and What does "Eye Contact" really mean?

Nonverbal Communication Analysis #2097: Mitt Romney's "No one's ever asked to see my birth certificate" defense - Body Language of Rationalization, Rapport and Empathy

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Sunday, September 9, 2012

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 2103:
Great Example of a Microexpression of Fear

In the above video, there's a fantastic example of a microexpression of fear. At the 0:55 mark - Zach Israel, a Barack Obama supporter who lost his seat at the President's DNC speech when it got moved indoors - displays a classic body language signal of fear on his mouth via a microexpression. While here, the "fear-mouth" is fully displayed, this extremely common nonverbal tell is often signaled more subtly and/or on just one side of the mouth during a deposition, negotiation or in a sales pitch.

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Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 1927:
Italy's Fans watching Euro 2012 Final - Expressions of Fear

Italy's football fans in this photo are watching their team playing Spain in the Euro 2012 finals ... with much trepidation. The man on the right has some subtle to moderate body language manifestations of fear. Notice how his neck is slightly taught. Higher levels of fear will result in more extreme contraction and an appearance of "tenting" of the superficial neck muscle known as the platysma (see also: Analysis # 329: The Neck of Fear). While self-touching in general indicates the more general emotion of anxiety - MAPs (Manipulators, Adaptors or Pacifiers) of the face (e.g., woman on the left), neck, chin (man on the right), manumbrium (upper portion of sternum) or the upper torso are more consistent with fear. This man's mouth is also stretched down and backwards at the "corners". Note that we see his bottom teeth exposed - and although subtle, this also highly characteristic of the "mouth of fear" (see also: Analysis # 301: Angela Merkel's Mouth of Fear).

It is important to note the extreme variety of events which people may "fear", even though we often think of this emotion as one indicative of a physically threatening action or other relatively extreme catastrophe. No so. Empathy and careful observation shows otherwise. Thus, it is very valuable to note these displays in negotiations, the sales processes, and other professional settings.

Spain triumphed in the largest margin of victory ever in a UEFA EURO final, 4-0.

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Saturday, May 19, 2012

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 1818:
Political Correctness, a Partial Emblematic Slip
at a Falcon, Colorado Elementary School

A second grader from Falcon, Colorado as part of a class project, was assigned to portray the figure of Martin Luther King Jr. When Sean King showed up at school with his face painted black, trouble ensued. He was asked to wash the paint off, but he and his parents refused. This nonverbal analysis concentrates on in that of Stephanie Meredith, a school district Spokeswoman (see during 0:47 to 0:54).

Ms. Meredith said, "When other students are offended by something, it's really the Principal's role to make sure that the educational environment is safe for all the students." She may believe this statement to be valid - in general - but in this specific case she does not agree with the action of the school principal. She is playing the good soldier.

Note that at several times Ms. Meredith shrugged with her right shoulder (vertical moving up and down) several times in this short clip (her left shoulder is moving - but it's moving laterally as her head and upper body moves back and forth). This is a beautiful body language example of a "Partial Emblematic Slip" wherein this partial (unilateral) shrug indicates doubt of the spokeswoman's own words. When there is a disparity between the spoken word and the nonverbal signals - the body language is always correctly - reflecting the true emotions-thoughts.

Thought experiment: Change the setting here a bit and suppose for a minute that you were the chief negotiator representing company A, and Ms. Meredith was the head negotiator for corporation B. If she exhibited similar body language as the nonverbals she displayed in this video - you would be sure she was bluffing.

Hmmm....

Analysis # 1720: Critical Evaluation, Disbelief & a Partial Emblematic Slip - Valerie Trierweiler & Francois Hollande

Analysis # 1492: Ben Bernake's Duping Delight & Partial Emblematic Slip

Secret # 743 & 744: Sarkozy's Shhh! & a Partial Emblematic Slip

Analysis # 343: Clandestine Thumbs Up - an Emblematic Slip

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Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Nonverbal Communication Analysis # 1709:
Peyton Manning's Agent Does Not Fully Believe

Tom Condon, a "super-agent" in the NFL world, has significant doubts as to whether Peyton Manning is healthy enough, fully healed and able to fill his new roll as starting quarterback with the Denver Broncos. He didn't say this with his words - but his body language gave us a view into his real feelings.

Just after Charlie Rose asked Condon about Peyton Manning, the agent displays a brief (just a bit longer than a microexpression) Inward Lip Roll (ILR) at the 3:46 mark. This is a very reliable signal of anxiety - and more specifically, a sign of "holding in" negative emotion.

Mr. Condon also looked down and to his right when discussing Peyton Manning and his health. Looking in this right-lower quadrant, has a significant correlation with highly emotional issues - when the speaker is right handed. Tom Condon cares about his client, but he also has significant emotional concern here. I'm not saying he's lying, but Condon's gut is telling him that Peyton's injury may prevent him from the expected level of performance - he's worried.

See also:

Secret # 171: A Subtle Sign of Sadness

Secret # 1499: Bill Clinton's Empathy for Eric Fehrnstrom and Mitt Romney - What's your Sincerity Quotient?

Incredulity is displayed by Condon's left eyebrow and forehead elevation. This nonverbal is easy to see just after Mr. Rose poses his question - during the 3:51 - 3:55 segment. Also seen at the 3:51 mark, Mr. Condon displays an extended (much longer than a normal blink) bilateral eyelid closure - and in this context it's an indicator that he is psychologically wanting to "escape" from the question and/or issue and block them from his mind.

See also:

Secret # 412: Newt Gingrich is Incredulous

Secrets # 335 & 353: Incredulous with Contempt - Amanda Know Redux

Secret # 67: Incredulous Cluster

Secret # 1697: George Zimmerman's Testimony - Fear, Incredulity, Regret & Contempt

Notice also that Mr. Condon never answered Charlie Rose's question. He spoke about Peyton's commitment, how hard he's working, other people's assessment of Manning's health, etc. - but he never said anything definitive. Condon sounded like a politician here. Contrasting his body language and verbal tone of excitement to other parts of the conversation e.g., when discussing (with a good "social smile") Andrew Luck going to the Indianapolis Colts or Robert Griffin (even Joking) to the Redskins - contrasts greatly compared with the discussion of Manning. We can see the hesitancy in his face and hear it in his voice.

Condon was glad to have the interview end - for when Charlie Rose said, "It's going to be a great season...", (4:26 mark) is when we see the agent's face change and six components of a sincere smile quickly emerge - partial closure of the eyelids, a concave-up furrow in the lower lids, a trace lowering of the eyebrows, a relaxed forehead, upward pulling cheeks and a mouth smile with only his upper teeth visible.

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Saturday, April 7, 2012

Negotiation Nonverbal Communication Secret # 1503:
The Conventional Steeple vs. The Basketball Steeple -
Seeking a Balance

Bill Burton, senior strategist for the super PAC, Priorities USA, is seen here in an interview discussing big oil money, Mitt Romney and Barack Obama. At various times during this video, Mr. Burton uses both the conventional high steeple as well as the basketball steeple.

The conventional steeple should be used very sparingly. For while it is true, that it can transmit emotions of confidence - it should only be displayed for a second or two. As deliberately as a surgeon wields a scalpel ... or a laser - this steeple variation should "dance" in unison with a particular word or phrase - not held there for long periods of time and/or dialog as if they were Super Man posing with his fists-closed, arms akimbo. Many use this nonverbal, without realizing it, as if they are using a wall brush to paint a fine portrait (e.g. Angela Merkel uses it excessively). It's wields sloppy results. It may make the SPEAKER feel like he's powerful, but a rapport builder it's not. It alienates much more often than it projects confidence. The conventional steeple is almost always overused and gives strong signals of arrogance and condescension. A few seconds too much at the wrong time and it will backfire. This is particularly true if the higher-held conventional steeple is used, but it's also true for lower-held positions. If you're TRULY in a position of power, confidence or leadership - this "body language version of wearing a muscle shirt" isn't needed. This is much more than a metaphor though, for people who over-use the conventional steeple tend to also have strong narcissistic qualities.

A variation of the steeple that doesn't resemble it's over-alpha cousin, is known as the "Basketball Steeple". This is where the hands and fingers are held apart, fingers slightly curved, about the width of a basketball. Mr. Burton also displays this variety of the steeple in the video. This body language gesture sends signals and engenders feelings of confidence without arrogance - a combination of emotions that is far too rare.

See also: Secret # 375: Signals of Confidence, Non-Engagement and Defeat

See also: Secret # 493: Contrasting David Cameron and Nicholas Sarkozy - Alpha & Beta Behavior

See also: Secret # 901: The Over-used Steeple - Backfire in Berlin

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Friday, April 6, 2012

Negotiation Nonverbal Communication Secret # 1522:
False Mastication in Court
Alicia DeBolt and
Adam Longoria

This is Adam Longoria. Today he was found guilty of capital murder of 14 year-old Alicia DeBolt. Notice the right side of Longoria's mouth. He's showing us a subtle example of what is known as "False Mastication" or "False chewing". Most all of us occasionally display this nonverbal when we're nervous - a gentle chewing of the inside of the cheek with the teeth. This is just one of many self-soothing gestures that are classified under the general category of "manipulators" or "adaptors" or "pacifiers" (MAPs). MAPs will be significantly manifested during times of stress and anxiety.

It is very interesting to note that in the context of conversation, should someone display false mastication, it significantly increases the odds that this secondary to deception-related anxiety. Since Longoria is not speaking, his anxiety is most probably secondary to what is being said by an attorney.

Should you notice this during a negotiation or business venture, be very wary of what was just spoken - for it is evidence of anxiety, and perhaps deception.

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Thursday, April 5, 2012

Negotiation Nonverbal Communication Secret # 1415:
Justin Rose -
A Puffer Fish at the Masters

The "Puffer Fish" is a common body language tell seen just prior to (when the expectation and outcome is generally known), or more typically just following a stressful event. With his cheeks distended, Justin Rose, probably just hit into the rough - and it's not too difficult to interpret this and place this nonverbal in context when watching The Masters. However it's incredible how often body language signals such as this are seen - only to be discounted - in a business, political, legal scenarios, etc. If you see this sign - don't ignore it. There is much more stress in those who display it than is ever verbally expressed.

The Puffer Fish which occurs during exhalation (although several consecutive cycles may be seen) lowers the blood pressure, pulse and is consistent with slower deeper breathing - and has a calming effect. This is in distinction to "Tight Lipped Breathing" which can look similar to the body language novice.

See also: Body Language Secret # 1122: Tiger, Pebble Beach & The Puffer Fish

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Negotiation Nonverbal Communication Secret # 1488:
Chief Justice John Roberts'
Bitter-Regret Smile

Chief Justice of the U.S. Supreme Court, John Roberts, examples here an extremely common body language tell - and a very valuable one in the negotiation process (particularly for a Judge, he has a horrible poker face). Whatever verbal message that is conveyed when/just before/after a person displays such a "Bitter Smile" (Ekman) - it is an absolute that their true emotions are being held back - very often in flavor, and always in amplitude.

Whenever the verbal and nonverbal messages are in disparity, the nonverbal is representative of what is truly being felt and thought. This particular bitter-regret "smile" guarantees some disparity.

Believe it or not, we all make this bitter smile much more often than we think. The vast majority of the times, people think they are making a slight, polite smile (a "social smile") - when in actuality our mouths are concave down! (and our eyes are very far from "smiling eyes" - see Secret # 353: Brad Pitt's Smiling Eyes - Sincere and Insincere Smiles). This is yet another profound example of just how much our "emotional-proprioception" is desensitized during moments of negative emotions. In other words, virtually everyone is extremely unaware of just how much anger, sadness, fear, anxiety, vulnerability, etc. are displayed on their faces and bodies. This is very true aspect of human behavior, regardless of whether it's in retrospection or in real-time.

Chief Justice Roberts is rumored to have a genius level I.Q. But remember, I.Q. is an abbreviation for "Intelligence Quotient" - intellectual intelligence, not emotional intelligence or emotional awareness. Ironic to some, those with a lot of formal education, on-average, have considerably less emotional awareness than those with only a high school education. We tend to ride more on our J.D., M.D., Ph.D, MBA, etc. and less on developing and maintaining our interpersonal skills. This is a pit-fall for which many (even most) attorneys, physicians, politicians and C-level executives suffer - they are largely in polite denial. Indeed, the average physician is superior at diagnosis, surgery and running a small business when they're 37, 47 or 57 - but their interpersonal skills very often were better when they were 27. The emperor is naked.

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Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Negotiation Nonverbal Communication Secret # 1490:
Kansas Surrenders

Ben Fraser of the Kansas Jayhawks is displaying a classic sports "Emblem". An emblem is a nonverbal signal that - within a given region, culture or country - carries a specific and recognized meaning. Within the "culture of sports" (around the World), this "Hands on Head" body language indicates a missed opportunity or a loss. Care must be taken when interpreting emblems though - for they can often have completely different meanings in other cultures or contexts.

It is curious how this emblem is identical to that of surrender seen in armed conflict or during police arrests. While many nonverbals with raised hands are positive, these are three notable exceptions.

The Kentucky Wildcats defeated the Kansas Jayhawks in the men's NCAA basketball final last night, 67-59. Coaches take note: when your players strike this pose - they have "emotionally thrown in the towel". You have already lost.

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Monday, April 2, 2012

Negotiation Nonverbal Communication Secret # 1496:
Tiger Woods' Disgust & Biofeedback

Tiger Woods is perhaps back on track - and just in time for The Masters. After a dry spell of two and a half years - Tiger won his first PGA tournament late last month at The Arnold Palmer Invitational at Bay Hill. In this image of Tiger, we see a mild-to-moderate display of disgust. His mid-face tightening of the "mustache area" accompanied by flaring of the nostrils is highly indicative of the display of disgust. Less dramatic (and secondary) body language signals of this negative emotion are seen in the slight dimpling of Woods' chin, the moderate wrinkling between his eyebrows (as well as lowering of those brows) and the parentheses shaped furrows on each side of the golfer's lower nose & mustache area. Collectively, these configurations comprise a cluster of contempt.

Like most high achieving athletes, Woods holds himself to high standards - and is self-critical. Thus this body language/facial expression of disgust is a very common one for Tiger. I put forth the argument, that if Tiger Woods maintained a facial expression closer to being emotionally neutral at such crucial times, this would improve his performance. The same would hold true for any athlete, student, surgeon, sales person, attorney, etc. Greater emotional self-awareness is a natural by-product of nonverbal training & practice and is an extremely valuable, rarely considered and very under-utilized form of biofeedback.

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Negotiation Nonverbal Communication Secret # 1499:
Bill Clinton's Empathy for Eric Fehrnstrom and
Mitt Romney ...
What's Your Sincerity Quotient?

Former President Bill Clinton displays a great body language cluster of honest regret at the 0:48 mark of this video. It is expressed as several microexpression directed towards Mitt Romney and his director of communications, Eric Fehrnstrom. Mr. Clinton acknowledges that sometimes, one of the worst thinks in politics is to tell the truth - as Mr. Fehrnstrom did when he started the "Etch A Sketch" controversy (see also Secret # 1486: Etch A Sketch, Romney & Eric Fehrnstrom Gaffe).

Note the entire width of Bill's forehead is contracted - simultaneously elevating his eyebrows as well. Mr. Clinton's eyes are opened slightly wider than the resting/relaxed state would dictate. In this context, these all serve as signals of increased emphasis. This is one of the few times when eyelids are opened wider than usual other than when fear, rage or surprise predominate one's emotional tone. This is followed by a brief, but noticeably extended blink - an attempt at blocking or "wiping" the thought from his mind's eye (as if to say, "I'd hate to be running his campaign - because we couldn't fix this problem").

Mr. Clinton's head is also tilted very slightly (usually this component of this cluster is somewhat greater in amplitude). His mouth is highly characteristic of regret - that of tightly stretched lips with a co-existing "inverted smile".

Although the former President is left-handed, his brain is wired much like a right-handed person (thus he probably is ambidextrous). Bill looks down and to his right when he experiencing a strong emotional tone - particularly that involving empathy or sadness (statistically, it would be more common for a left-hander to look down to his/her left when experiencing such emotions).

In a nutshell, Bill Clinton agrees with Eric Fehrnstrom - there will be a "reset" or "shaking of the Etch A Sketch", once the Republican primary is over. However, Clinton does not believe Mitt Romney will be able to pull off any "move to the center" for the November election.

One of the big reasons while so very many people love Bill Clinton, even republicans, is his ability to project empathy and sincerity. It is a fundamental human quality to which of us are naturally attracted. Love him or hate him - few approach his ability to do this. Many would benefit by this skill. What's your "Sincerity Quotient"?

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This website serves as a reference source for the art and science of Body Language/Nonverbal Communication. The views and opinions expressed on this website are those of the author. In an effort to be both practical and academic, many examples from/of varied cultures, politicians, professional athletes, legal cases, public figures, etc., are cited in order to teach and illustrate both the interpretation of others’ body language as well as the projection of one’s own nonverbal skills in many different contexts – not to advance any political, religious or other agenda.

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