• 0 Posts
  • 97 Comments
Joined 3 years ago
Cake day: June 20th, 2023
  • Slayan@lemmy.catoAsk Lemmy@lemmy.world•Please help me under stand my spouse's gift and their hurt
    2·
    3 months ago

    My S.O. : maybe they feel their good intention weren’t aknowledged? So that’s why they are hurting. It’s important for you to respect your values, but maybe in the process they felt their emotions were discarded by wanting to return the gift.

    Me: To be frank, i don’t know :) i don’t know because i’m not you and it’s not my situation. I do know there are no easy statement which will make it all disapear. I also know love hurt sometime, but this suffering is the proof of your love. So take your time, and talk it out. I wish you the best op.

    P.s. My s.o is autistic, and she has tendecies to shutdown when she’s upset. Maybe a shutdown instead of the silent treatment, you know your s.o best, but i want you to know Silent treatment is a form of abuse.

  • Slayan@lemmy.catoAsk Lemmy@lemmy.world•Please help me under stand my spouse's gift and their hurt
    1·
    3 months ago

    Are you being punished or are you feeling punished. This is a point you should talk about with your s.o

    I’ve been dating the same girl for 16 yrs now and she finally understood how important the word “i am sorry” are to me. Is it her fault? Nah is it mine? I don’t think so, because i’m pretty sure i stated it clearly multiple time. Is there really a need for someone to be at fault?

    Your s.o anger might not be directed toward you, but more toward the situation, which your are part of.

  • Slayan@lemmy.catoAsk Lemmy@lemmy.world•You guys have any conversation starters to offer a poor lemming?
    60·
    5 months ago

    This is an old post i saved for this kind of moment so here ya go.

    About 6 or 7 years ago my college roommate told me: Conversation isn’t something any one person is good or bad at, it’s a skill like anything else. Everything changed once I thought about it like this.

    1. The more new people you talk to the easier it is. Especially the opposite sex.

    2. Everyone else has their own anxieties and fears. They’re just better at hiding it or masking it than you. Use this to your advantage to point out things you have in common and relate to them.

    3. When someone talks, LISTEN. Don’t worry about your posture, your dog, your clothing. Listen to them. If you don’t understand something, stop them and ask. Engage with them. Everyone you meet knows something you don’t know.

    4. Ask open ended questions. Don’t ask, “Did you have a good day?” Instead ask “What was the best part about your day?” “What’s your favorite and least favorite thing about your job?” Make them feel important. Everyone loves to talk about themselves. So do you. Take that feeling and shove it way down. When they ask about you, that’s your turn to shine. If they don’t, you don’t really want to be friends anyway.

    5. Never one-up people. Even if you are way better, or know way more than the person talking to you, build them up.

    6. If someone is telling a story or saying something and they get cut off, find the next opportunity to bring them back in. “Hey, _______ you were talking about X, what did you want to say?”

    7. Laugh at their jokes. Laugh at your jokes. We’re all weird brains walking around in these skin things. Don’t take it so seriously.

    8. You will remember your mistakes WAY more than anyone else. Stop taking yourself so seriously.

    9. My last and 2nd most important tip. Start every conversation with a compliment. I don’t care if they’re a dude and you’re straight as fuck. I don’t care if they’re mean, evil to you, or disagree with you politically in every way. Find something about the way they look, and compliment it. Someone did this to me once when I was a new guest at someone’s apartment. “Hey man, that’s an awesome jacket, where’d you get it?” I fucking loved that jacket. And I was self conscious about it. I felt instantly at home.

    Take the things you like, and be that person for someone else. If you’re on a date, be genuinely interested in that person.

    These are things that worked for me. Find your own style.

    The #1 tip!! Go into EVERY room as if people will like you. Seriously. Walk through any door, in front of any group of people and smile. They. Will. Like you. Keep that in the front of your mind and you will enjoy conversations with anyone.

  • Slayan@lemmy.catoCanada@lemmy.ca•Canada dropped the Digital Services Tax because of dairy supply management
    3·
    7 months ago

    Hello could you point to me where the leger firm statement about supply management is? I’m trying to find it and i can’t. The only thing i found about it is citynew aka rogers saying they translated a story from lapresse but i can’t even find this.

    It’s also stated that the poll were made in two days and pulled/asked 1001 person, so i doesn’t really represent the quebec population. Also when i try to find anything related to supply management, everything is 1-2 yeara old

    Tl dr: this seems like a shit report, and i’m unable to find any source. Do you have any?

  • Slayan@lemmy.catoAsk Lemmy@lemmy.world•Which country do you live in and how much paid time off work do you get?
    3·
    9 months ago

    I have 4 week of vacation per year can’t move them. Boss is pretty chill so he give us 2 extra. They are not paid vacation, but i get canada EI for those.

    We also have 13 (14?) holiday These are paid by money taken from my salary each week( ± 15%) and given back twice year a in a lump sum (btw 3k-5k depending on the hours you worked) a month before our 2 week mandated vacation.

    I’m also permanently on the canada EI. I just went and look it up, i could go 34 week without working (minus the 4 mandatory vacation week) and they would pay me 668$/ week, but i have to stay in canada to get that.