@internetsdairy@mastodon.art cover
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internetsdairy

@[email protected]

Hi! I'm an animator working in higher education, here to read the funnies. I sometimes make stupid music videos:
https://vimeo.com/internetsdairy
he/him

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@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

Telling my kid this is his new school uniform

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

Kid is at the Who fandom stage of drawing tiny one-inch square pictures of K-9.

A scrap of paper on which is drawn K-9 in black biro: basically a large roomba with an aerial tail and little radar dishes for ears. A voice out of frame says via speech bubble, "Oh my, K-9, are you alright?" K-9 replies, in a spiky bubble, "Affirmative".
ALT
@Nickiquote@mstdn.social avatar Nickiquote , to random
internetsdairy ,
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@Nickiquote @TheBreadmonkey 🎵 Heathcliff, it's me, I'm Cathy
I've come, let me in your window

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party avatar TheBreadmonkey , to random

TIL escalators in the UK move 1.5x faster than those in Korea. What this means for us all is yet to be revealed.

internetsdairy ,
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@TheBreadmonkey argh I really want to know why this is now whether it's cultural or something else but I can only find that they're cross about over-reliance on Chinese escalators because they keep fucking up why do I have a job

internetsdairy ,
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@TheBreadmonkey here's a rabbit hole if you haven't encountered them before: have you heard of or been in a paternoster lift?

are there any movie action scenes based on them and if not, wtf not?

internetsdairy ,
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@TheBreadmonkey "The Arts Tower at the University of Sheffield[40] has a paternoster, which is said to be the largest on Earth." <<<Earth, that's where I live!

internetsdairy ,
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@IsabelB @TheBreadmonkey This is the allure... have you gone over the top and if so what secrets did you behold???

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

I've never seen an air fryer IRL, does steam come out of them while they're cooking?

internetsdairy OP ,
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@TheBreadmonkey Thank you... genuine question, I am animating one

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

Two foxes hanging out on a neighbour's shed roof. The one in motion has an injured leg, though still seems pretty agile.

Small back gardens between terraced houses. One fox is in the middle of jumping down from a grassy shed roof to a lower shed roof. A second fix sits curled in the corner of the grassy roof.
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@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

So do the ski jumpers squirt the acid directly downwards out of their penis using the same principle as a rocket jump in Quake

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

Very estate agent vibes from this guy

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

Temu Manics get off

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

My wife picked up a zine that is advertising the fediverse.

A lofi zine ad in green reading: "Fediverse Punk Month. Hey, punk! Fuck corporate social media. Spend January on the Fediverse. Alternative decentralised, open, not for profit DIY social media. allpunxpleaseleave.meta.com " There is a sketch of a calendar page for January and a scared looking blonde punk kid running away a large sheet of bubble wrap or something.
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internetsdairy OP ,
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Let's hope there are punk workshops for accessible graphic design

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

No now as my strange child wants to watch Revenge of the Fucking Cybermen, I believe

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

This is great, I bet it didn't go to Eurovision

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

N-Sync implies the existence of N-Toilet and maybe even N-Bidet, if you're fancy

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

Why do they have kind of blacksmith aprons on

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

Funny to think this is a cover of that Keith Harris and Orville song

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

BBC4 is not working on my TV for some reason though I can see you lot are getting

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

-Hey Jesus, did you sort that wine out yet?
-No, sorry it's...

A Pret metal bottle of Still Water.
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@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

There's a little Waterstones in John Lewis now. Also a wild pigeon

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

There are four billion Lego minifigs in the world. Time for Denmark to activate their sleeper army.

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

Ok marketing people, I know eyes are versatile and very tempting graphic devices but you have got to stop using them in viscerally horrific ways, especially when you are trying to get people to go to the optician jesus christ what is wrong with you?

Illustration of a roller skate where the wheels have been replaced by eyes. Underneath is equally horrific text reading: "The future is here! Meet Billie, our new virtual optometrist."
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@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

This is what politicians imagine will happen when they visit a factory and stand in front of a bunch of the workers for the press

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

kKENICKIEEEEEEEEE

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

This is such a sublime song, like nothing else, where did it come from

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random
@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

Hey we thought you were introducing this song out of the goodness of your heart Will Smith but what's this you had an ulterior motive????

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

Not getting great FPS on this game

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

Was it Mansun who went kind of prog?

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

Sirs, this is a funeral

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

Since this washing machine hose was made in Italy, it counts as a type of pasta.

A coiled blue hose in transparent packaging.
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@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

"hehehe... Going to bury these filthy carrots where nobody will find them... suckers..."

A young man crouching in an agricultural field holding a bunch of dirty carrots above a hole. Photo on a display in Sainsbury's.
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@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

It's weird what household tips stick with you, like 35 years ago I saw a Ben Elton obcom sketch where he said how if you leave corn flakes to dry in a bowl they form the most adhesive substance known to humanity so you should always put the bowl to soak so this doesn't happen and anyway, I don't think my wife saw this sketch.

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

Muppets Christmas Carol where Michael Caine is a Muppet, all the other characters are real frogs, pigs, insects etc. not talking in a Babe way or anything, just crawling over the sets where they will.

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

This Santa is going to absolutely wreck your chimney this Christmas.

A large non-living Santa dummy in an office foyer. It stands about twice as tall as a tall man. Some gifts are on the floor next to its feet and a large white teddy bear is affixed to its armpit. It has a foolish expression.
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internetsdairy OP ,
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And your toilet

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

Proud to have raised a being from a helpless infant to someone who will send me beasts from illuminated manuscripts.

A medieval marginalia illustration of a plucky young snail/prawn brandishing a wooden shield and a sword. This appears in a WhatsApp thread with the message "opinions on snail" to which I have replied "I believe it's not prawn"
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@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

My social life is barely there, maybe I should join the new cult that opened a centre in the high street

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

"I have placed a glass egg, above us floating
"An oval ovule in a dark blood red void
"Carries our digital selves, embracing and kissing"
Bjork, that's beautiful, but I just don't think it's good infosec

internetsdairy OP ,
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There's a Bjork concert on TV by the way and at one point she went into a special reverb shed to sing a song, and now there's a guy dipping bowls in and out of water (a Foley artist I guess)

internetsdairy OP ,
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Bjork, look behind you, the flautists have got in your shed!

@internetsdairy@mastodon.art avatar internetsdairy , to random

no

Poster for the Eye Emporium featuring an eye in the form of a layer cake with a slice cut out. A caption reads 'See every layer of your eye'.
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internetsdairy OP ,
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I nearly fainted when the optician showed me a photo of my retina one time, I do not need to know about whatever gross optical frostings are in there

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party avatar TheBreadmonkey , to random

I think of little else

If You Had A Pole Stretching From England To France And Yanked On It, Would The Person On The Other End Be Yanked Instantly?

https://www.iflscience.com/if-you-had-a-pole-stretching-from-england-to-france-and-yanked-it-would-the-other-end-move-instantly-81713

internetsdairy ,
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@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party avatar TheBreadmonkey , to random

If I were a billionaire (and I'm sure I've said this before), I would simply build a large padded underground lair with a sort of food-delivery chute, and noone would ever hear from me again.

internetsdairy ,
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@TheBreadmonkey how do you know you don't