@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw cover
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

JoscelynTransient

@[email protected]

White Trash Tranny Dyke

#BallessBitch #ADHDisaster 🌈🏳️‍⚧️
Gender Euphoria Basics: Gender Euphoria Basics for Trans Fems (https://chaosfem.tw/@JoscelynTransient/110226818047150799)

Transpiring Considerations: https://chaosfem.tw/@JoscelynTransient/109886947900877778

Trans Music Monday: https://chaosfem.tw/@JoscelynTransient/110911825722130749

Profile picture: a picture of Harley Quinn looking haggard and scratched up drinking a cup of coffee with trans pride colors squiggled behind her.

Banner image: An image of the Bi Pride flag with howling werewolves on each side facing the center. Courtesy of Kiki (@gallowswitch)

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. View on remote instance

@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar JoscelynTransient , to random

RE: https://hachyderm.io/@Impossible_PhD/116049203988937540

I’m excited about this book! Check it out if you haven’t!

@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar JoscelynTransient , to random

It’s weird, in my dreams, if I am at home, I am never in my current home or even in any of the places I’ve lived at in other countries. I’m always at my mom’s house where I grew up or my grandparents house where I stayed often.

This brought to you by waking up two hours early due to a recurrence of the setting and situation of my old PTSD nightmare, but without the trauma or fear or guilt. It was actually positive-ish? But it still woke me up and got my brain really active for reasons I don’t understand 😅

JoscelynTransient OP ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

The other part I still don’t understand, when I wake up, I’m genuinely confused about where I am and expect to see that same room I lived in decades ago. Been that way ever since I first started getting vivid dreams with my antidepressants. It takes me at least a minute for my knowledge of my life today to reassemble in my brain and everything to make sense.

…having a traumatized brain is weird. 😅

@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar JoscelynTransient , to random

English needs a new word for “cute” for when we talk about a “cute guy” so as to not sound infantalizing…so I can tell the trans guy I’m meeting with today that he’s handsome and cute in the way that makes me want to blush and giggle like a tween.

JoscelynTransient OP ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

TRANS MASCS/GUYS : what kind of appearance compliments do you like and that hit you right? Is there a preferred way that makes you feel like a hot guy that makes ladies want to blush and squee like teenager girls?

JoscelynTransient OP ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

I do love one of the consensus words is “dapper” - I’m here for trans guys to bring back dapper masculinity from the turn of the 20th century. The trans girls can all become ethereal witches and the trans guys can become dapper gentleman in a three piece suit. This is how things should be.

@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar JoscelynTransient , to random

I think I’m starting to figure out that I can only write every other day. 😅

Been writing a lot more again, but the next day I always feel wiped out and depressed and unmotivated. So…maybe with this in mind I can finally figure out how to schedule my life so as to keep writing? Like, my last few attempts always fell apart after tryin to write several days in a row. So instead, I’m going to treat every other day as a rest day and see how that goes? 🤷🏼‍♀️

@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar JoscelynTransient , to random

Anyone have suggestions on what to do if one is considering selling stuff on Etsy?

I’m considering trying to bring in some cash by selling Japanese calligraphy, mostly doing gay and kinky and weird things others aren’t likely to do with calligraphy. Not sure I can follow through on it, but would be nice to see what that might involve.

@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar JoscelynTransient , to random

I think I have a new treatment for depression!

  1. it turns out hair follicles release serotonin to communicate with adjacent neurons (https://www.imperial.ac.uk/news/248975/hidden-feel-touch-uncovered-imperial-researchers/).

  2. Depression involves low concentrations of serotonin in the nervous system.

  3. if we implant a bunch of new hair follicles in a person, this would mean more serotonin being released.

  4. we implant millions of new hair follicles all over a person’s body in dense patches to provide increased serotonin release and….wait…wait, did I just reinvent furries? 😅

@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar JoscelynTransient , to random

I kind of want to try to collect the stories of trans fems who came out after being in a long term relationship or married to cis women. There is so much about our experiences that we are trying to understand in sharing with each other and that those on the outside just don’t get. And I want the good stories, the horrific bad stories, and the confusing, awkward middle stories.

Would anyone else be interested in contributing to such a project? Don’t know if I got the spoons to follow through completely by myself, so would be extra great if anyone was interested in helping make it happen.

@Impossible_PhD@hachyderm.io avatar Impossible_PhD , to random

After being reminded by the most recent Ranma episode:

My favorite fan theory about Ranma from back in the day is that Ranma and Akane are in fact madly in love the whole series

and also are both switches with MASSIVE degradation kinks. 🤭

JoscelynTransient ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

@Impossible_PhD I have always thought it as being written that they do love each other but Ranma is really immature about his feelings and feels insecure in his masculinity, so he doesn’t know how to handle having feelings for an independent-minded girl like Akane.

And Akane has some baggage about men…which is why my fan head canon is that she secretly really likes that he turns into a girl….and she is secretly bisexual… 🤭

…in fact, Shampoo and Ukyo are pansexual too, since they ultimately don’t care about Ranma’s sex…this is definitely not a transfem having motivated reasoning, nope… 😅

JoscelynTransient ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

@theogrin @Impossible_PhD well, I mean…back then, queerness had a level of acceptance as long as you kept it behind closed doors and still married a person of another gender for the sake of the household and having children. And it was also normal for even straight couples to view marriage as a practical matter and for romantic love to be something that happened outside of marriage.

Basically, it probably would have been better to be queer in 80s Japan in a big city than most of the US (with maybe SF and NYC as exceptions). Heck, there was even a tradition of encouraging romances between young women for centuries as “practice” for adulthood and marriage (which is problematic but meant there were normalized times and places for it). This is where the Yuri genre comes from and has literary origins as a genre in the 1910s and 20s.

Rule of thumb, in most of the 20th century, it was basically better to be gay and trans almost anywhere in the world outside the “first” and “second” (Europe/North America and USSR/PRC).

JoscelynTransient ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

@theogrin @Impossible_PhD the only thing is that people didn’t really have sexual orientation as an identity - it was more something one did than who someone was. And compared to today, there were still a lot of issues with expectations to keep up heteronormative appearances and not being free to live as your gender or sexual orientation fully openly. That’s where the work is largely focused today.

JoscelynTransient ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

@Impossible_PhD i do always love the story from this episode. Ranma’s only idea of how to trick Ryoga being to pretend to be a secret fiancée…because that’s what usually messes up his life. 😅

And Ukyo discovering Ranma can change sex, and just finding it fun to change him back and forth 🤣

And Akane seeing through Ranma’s nonsense immediately!

@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar JoscelynTransient , to random

If you have ever had a social psychology experiment told you as a poignant story that illustrated a theory or idea, it has probably been debunked.

In the last 5 - 10 years, almost every famous 20th century social psychology experiment has been revealed to have been not reproducible, misrepresented, misinterpreted, or straight up wrong. This list includes:
-The Standford Prison Experiment
-The Milgram Experiment
-When Prophecy Fails

@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar JoscelynTransient , to random

What am I doing for the holiday? I am staying home and enjoying some hot shark on shark action 🔥🦈🦈🔥

A selfie of me wearing a shark onesie with the hoodie down showing the shark teeth, nostrils, and left eye. I am snuggling a plushie shark
ALT
JoscelynTransient OP ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar JoscelynTransient , to random

What is the most bisexual werewolf / lycanthrope in computer / video games?

Qualifiers:

  1. Out of games that one could find on steam or for a console
  2. does not have to be explicitly bisexual, but must at least be extremely bisexually coded
  3. can be a visual novel or dating sim, but preferably not just a porn game
JoscelynTransient OP ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

Okay, at this point, can people just tell me all games they can think of with werewolves? Maybe I need to play them and rate them for bisexuality 🤭

The only ones that come to mind up front are:

  1. Skyrim and Morrowind (but not Oblivion, right?!)
  2. The Wolf Among Us
  3. Ravenswatch
  4. Baldur’s Gate 1 & 2 (NPC monster only)
  5. Neverwinter Nights (NPC monster only)

Where are my lycanthrope games at?!

JoscelynTransient OP ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar
  1. Altered Beast
  2. Bloody Roar 1 & 2 (lycanthropes of all kinds!!!)
JoscelynTransient OP ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

@Aurani I loved the wererabbit and werebat! I really wish we could get a 3rd one, but it’s hard to imagine the franchise getting revived after so long. I also genuinely liked the feel of it as a fighting game, as it had some really intuitive combo building and fighting style differences

JoscelynTransient OP ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

@Aurani oh, maybe it’s 2 & 3 that I’m thinking of…but yeah, nothing newer than PS2 sadly. They were just a tad too early to ride a wave of furry game players 🤭

Seriously, release that today and there is some serious money to make there from the growth in love for anthropomorphic characters

@Impossible_PhD@hachyderm.io avatar Impossible_PhD , to random

Goddamn, this last week has been rough.

JoscelynTransient ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

@Impossible_PhD offers of hugs as always 🫂🫂🫂

JoscelynTransient ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

@Impossible_PhD fair, hope circumstances and your own brain will let you rest and recover soon

@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar JoscelynTransient , to random

Trans siblings and cousins, thinking of all of you and grateful to have each and every one of you still in this world. Each of us brings our light to this community, and together we glow against the darkness. Sending love and care wherever you are 🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵

@Impossible_PhD@hachyderm.io avatar Impossible_PhD , (edited ) to random

One of the things that's hard about being autistic is that usually when you get pushed over the edge into a meltdown, the thing that pushed you over the edge isn't the reason why you're melting down BUT BOY HOWDY THAT'S THE THING YOU'RE MELTING DOWN OVER.

Because today? Why am I melting down today? Because some guy wanted to road rage assault me yesterday and that triggered my cPTSD in a huge way.

What am I melting down about? How hard it is to be asexual in an allosexual world.

Because someone was an asshole about it last night.

Goddamnit.

JoscelynTransient ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

@Impossible_PhD wish I could either sit nearby or squeeze you back into your body, whichever is more helpful, right now.

Makes sense what you say, and both of those people are shitfuckers and you did not deserve either of those situations. If I could reach my baseball bat through the computer screen, I would find both and bonk them on the head.

@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar JoscelynTransient , to random

Disabled and chronically ill friends: what do you do to make your life manageable with the limited spoons you have?

My mental illnesses have gotten back to where it is basically disabling, I often need to sleep 9 or 10 hours a day to sorta function and find my brain or body just can’t do certain things when I need to. But I need to be able to do some things, like even just cleaning up after myself and doing chores consistently would be an improvement. And long term I need to be able to earn some income because my wife’s salary isn’t enough for rent but too much for me to get much at all from disability (if I could even qualify).

So I gotta find a better way to live with this for the foreseeable future, and don’t know what to do differently

@Impossible_PhD@hachyderm.io avatar Impossible_PhD , to random

Of all my various identities, my demisexuality is the one I struggle the most with being proud of. I want to. I really want to. But it's hard. It's so fucking hard.

A few thoughts on being ace in an allosexual world, in honor of Asexual Awareness Week.

🧵

JoscelynTransient ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

@Impossible_PhD I'll just say, while there may have been past situations that led to people or situations that made you feel bad about it, I don't think it's creepy to feel that way towards people and just want to be a friend saying it's okay to have feelings and attractions.

Also...most allosexual people have attractions to a lot of their friends who are of the gender(s) they are attracted to...so sounds relatable to me? It doesn't sound broken or glitchy to me, if that's helpful at all. Not invalidating the frustrations you might get, just want you to know you're accepted for what you feel.

JoscelynTransient ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

@Impossible_PhD I've definitely known ace and demi friends scared of dating or intimidated by it for those exact reasons, you're definitely not alone. To a lesser extent, I can related to that fear and anxiety from when I first started dating a polyam trans woman after transition....and how it still feels now...it really can be intimidating and that anxiety is very understandable. 🫂

JoscelynTransient ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

@Impossible_PhD @faithisleaping the hell? Bluesky sounds like a shittier place every day and I don't understand why. Your thread is....kind of milquetoast? Like, there is nothing objectionable in there, just an ace person describing their experiences and some of the difficult things they feel because of intersecting bigotries they encounter. Ain't nothing wrong or shameful about that.

JoscelynTransient ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

@Impossible_PhD the fuck? Ugh I hate those assholes who are doing that

@sundogplanets@mastodon.social avatar sundogplanets , to random

I always pull up a light pollution map for places I'm giving talks, and nothing makes me appreciate my dark skies more. https://www.cleardarksky.com/maps/lp/large_light_pollution_map.html

Niagara, ouch that's some awful skies. I'm sorry.

A colour-coded light pollution map centred on Toronto, showing extremely high levels of light pollution pretty much everywhere, except the middle of the great lakes.
ALT
JoscelynTransient ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

@sundogplanets one of the things that gets me is that it is just such a wasteful and inefficient solution to the problem it supposedly is trying to solve. Like, maybe we could use other infrastructure to provide internet to the world rather than pouring CO2 into the atmosphere with rocket launches and polluting our upper atmosphere with materials that probably shouldn’t be up there and are expensive and rare? Just maybe???

@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar JoscelynTransient , to random

Beware all: I am feeling spicy and like smashing things with hammers today. No Mx. Nice Joscelyn today…instead it’s white trash bitch with teeth. BEWARE

JoscelynTransient OP ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

Also, apparently today is the day that cis men want to mansplain feminism at a woman who has taught gender studies courses. The fuck? Ugh, there’s a reason I stay in this corner of the fedi and don’t go over to that side…ughhhgughugh

JoscelynTransient OP ,
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

So um…if any of you are masochists and want a metaphorical hammer to your opinions, come at me with your most toxic ideas today because I will tear you a new one.

@JessTheUnstill@infosec.exchange avatar JessTheUnstill , to random

[Thread, post or comment was deleted by the author]

    •
    JoscelynTransient ,
    @JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @JessTheUnstill but if we can’t blame biology for the misbehavior of many men, then it’s almost like they have a choice in the matter and a responsibility to do better….clearly, you’re not a man, so we can’t listen to you. 😜

    I actually would bet a huge bit of the motivated reasoning for bioessentialism on this stuff is for shitty men and the people of other genders who enable them to deny responsibility for their actions.

    JoscelynTransient ,
    @JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @JessTheUnstill yeah, I think that plays the double role, especially for white cis women, of making themselves inherently the victim and innocent…while they do awful shit to BIPOC and trans people. Like, the number of white cishet women I’ve met who have a shitty man in their life that they enable in a “it can’t be helped” way and claim the eternal role of victim while saying they are feminists just boggles my mind. I’m always like…can you see what you’re doing? Hetero and cis-normativity are a hell of a drug.

    And of course, there’s the transfems who engage in this, as you’ve mentioned too. Comes from a slightly different place but does the same thing in the end. Maybe we stop blaming biology for bad actions and blame the people and systems that create and enable those actions? Please friends?

    @Impossible_PhD@hachyderm.io avatar Impossible_PhD , to random

    Okay, I'm at the museum today and I want to geek out about one if my very favorite things in the universe: manuscripts from the middle ages.

    This is an illuminated Qur'an from the 15-1600s. It's embellished with gold leaf and blue lapis ink.

    And most of y'all have NO IDEA how expensive that was.

    A spread from a lavishly illuminated Qur'an, appointed with lapis and gold.
    ALT
    JoscelynTransient ,
    @JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @Impossible_PhD it blew my mind when I first read about how the blue on Egyptian sculptures and sarcophagi and wall art was made with lapis lazuli from Afghanistan. Like…4000 years ago, there were regular and active trade relationships between North Africa and Central Asia….just bonkers

    JoscelynTransient ,
    @JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @Impossible_PhD that truly is a gorgeous manuscript! I really love the illuminated Islamic pieces. Because they weren’t allowed in many periods to depict humans or animals, they became intensely creative with motifs and abstract design. And when one thinks of everything that went into making them, it’s easy to imagine how sacred and powerful these items felt

    @Impossible_PhD@hachyderm.io avatar Impossible_PhD , to random

    I'm not gonna lie, sometimes I look at the work of other queer researchers and it feels absolutely ludicrous that I'm trying to add my own research to that body.

    Like... dang, who the heck do I think I am?

    JoscelynTransient ,
    @JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @Impossible_PhD you are Doc freaking Impossible, and you write brilliantly about things! And you writing and publishing doesn’t take space away from other queer researchers, it actually makes more room for all of us. Not to mention, have you seen the cis “scholars” that have published on transness? There are SO MANY of them and their work is often so cis gaze and trash. If those bafoons get to publish, you deserve to publish even more! 💖

    JoscelynTransient ,
    @JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @Impossible_PhD to make it clear: when I say Doc freaking Impossible, it’s not about name cache, it’s that I’m saying I think you are amazing and capable and insightful! And I believe in you gosh darn it! So you can try to minimize or invalidate the positivity all you want, but I will keep sending positivity waves at you wishing you the best - mwuahahaha! 😉

    And I know anxiety and trauma brain are saying those things, but do you really think it makes sense that you have misunderstood literally everything? Like, one or two mistakes are possible because you’re human and misunderstandings happen in the literature all the time. But it seems so unlikely as to be silly to think you misunderstood everything right?

    Also, think back to the conference you presented at where other scholars showed such appreciation and interest in your work! Keep that positive reception in mind when your brain tries to bring up all the negative stuff to tear you down if you can.

    I remember your friend believes in you and is cheering you on!

    @JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar JoscelynTransient , to random

    Transphobia often gets discussed as personal attitudes or explicit anti-trans policies, but the wider cis world often doesn’t see or understand the structural transphobia that impacts our lives. A big one that is impacting me again: discontinuities.

    When we transition, our life course, narratives, and social network experience many different discontinuities. An area where this can have big material consequences is in a professional or academic career.

    When applying to a job or a university, there is an assumption that a person can list the places with their relevant experience and then those people can be contacted and asked about the person. Well, if your name has changed, as well as your gender identity and presentation, there’s a whole host of problems this introduces. For example, I can list one of the places I worked or went to school before transition, but then I also have to out myself as trans and give my deadname to the place I’m applying to if they might reach out to check if I worked or graduated from there. Additionally, that then outs me to those people from the past as trans, who may be transphobic and give me a bad reference.

    Additionally, a lot of us face transphobia after coming out and may be more likely to be laid off or fired as a result. So then one of our only potential references that knows us by our current name and identity may be much less likely to give us a good recommendation. We’re basically put at the whims of those that employ us in ways that creates extra layers of intimidation and pressure, and may lead to us putting up with transphobia or worse due to that precarity.

    In my experience, I went from having a stellar resume that demonstrated 15+ years of experience with lots of recommendations and references to my resume looking either a lot like someone who only has 1 or 2 years of experience or I have to out myself and also share the ways I’ve been mistreated since transition. All of which makes a potential employer hesitant to hire us.

    There is a reason why there is a trans wage gap that is bigger than most other wage gaps, and why a fuck ton of us have to turn to sex work to pay the bills.

    JoscelynTransient OP ,
    @JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

    This doesn’t even touch on the discontinuities we experience in self-concept, relationships, social networks, health, and almost every other aspect of our lives. Especially the later we transition, the more it impacts so much of our lives.

    Some of us get lucky and experience far fewer breaks with our life as it was. Some of us get unlucky and lose everything. But this is not our fault, but largely the fault of transphobic attitudes, structures, and more.

    @2d@chaosfem.tw avatar 2d , to random

    i’m getting boobs in ONE WEEK

    JoscelynTransient ,
    @JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @2d BOOBS!!!

    JoscelynTransient ,
    @JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @JessTheUnstill @faithisleaping @2d this is the future liberals want: 3 pairs of boobs stacked on top of each other on every trans woman!!!

    @NicolaElle@chaosfem.tw avatar NicolaElle , to random

    A quick note to my siblings.

    If you ever find yourself with the opportunity and ability to care for or even visit a trans friend or family member post-surgery, do so. It is one of the most magical and healing experiences we can encounter.

    Thank you, @revoluciana , for sharing a time, place, and spirit with me. The last two weekends were amazing. I love you, girl; I am so glad you got to experience this, and that I got to share this time with you.

    :QueerCatHeart_Trans:

    JoscelynTransient ,
    @JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @NicolaElle @revoluciana I’m thankful as both of your friends that you were there for her. I wished I could have been, but knowing you were there and she had her community with her…makes it easy to trust our girl is recovering well 💜

    @NicolaElle@chaosfem.tw avatar NicolaElle , to random

    Realizing today just how broken the concept of heaven and hell makes people.

    You start with, “Follow these commandments. If you do, you end up in the spiffy place. If you don’t, you’re going to end up in eternal torment.”

    The idea of following rules because of eternal torment becomes more important than actually developing one’s own sense of moral duty, of questioning right and wrong - something that only comes from facing difficult choices, Morally ambiguous choices.

    The ultimate result of this is whole swaths of the population who’ve never developed their own morality, and would gladly sell their souls and everyone else’s lives if a two-bit swindler convinced them it’d give them a ticket to the spiffy place.

    JoscelynTransient ,
    @JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @NicolaElle Bertrand Russell wrote a really great essay on this if I remember, and it was part of me developing my understanding of my humanism. You’re absolutely on the money of how much damage especially the idea of hell can do. Not to mention, any time there’s a conversation where people go “if you don’t believe in hell, what’s to stop you from murdering people”….cause holy guacamole I hope that’s not the only thing keeping a person from committing murder!

    @itzyg@mostlygood.xyz avatar itzyg , to random
    • Unusually tall
    • Left old school under mysterious circumstances
    • physically strong for her size
    • thought to be tough, but is actually really sweet and gentle

    Sailor Jupiter is a trans girl

    JoscelynTransient ,
    @JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @itzyg OH MY GOSH someone else sees it! I said this to my wife the first time we watched Sailor Moon together!

    A few other key pieces of evidence:
    -she is coded as being experienced in a more masculine-coded martial art fighting style
    -she loves doing girly domestic things like making cute bento box lunches and cooking, like a transfem who gets euphoria from girly hobbies
    -when she meets Haruka (Sailor Uranus) presenting masculine, she gets all heart eyed and starts crushing on her, and the other girls say “but that’s a girl, you can’t!” And Jupiter says without hesitation, “I don’t care.” Sex characteristics don’t determine gender in her eyes!!!