This one just popped up. Bill McClintock is a mashup maestro!

I don’t think he uses AI for anything other than voice filters. Source

Try This one on for size!

Somebody set fire to a wall mounted bin with a firework inside it.
The deputy head went to put the fire out, the firework went of almost blowing his face off, allegedly, I didn’t see it as I was already in detention for an unrelated incident.
The deputy head storms straight into where I’m sat on my tod for detention and asks what do I think I’m playing at almost killing him.
The headmaster gets called in and everyone’s grilling me to confess for setting the bin on fire while I was in detention the whole time!

Similar to this I would imagine

£1.99? That seems worth a punt.

If England was playing Israel at football, who woukd you (A Scot) support?

Isn’t it short for narcotics?

I disagree. I recently had to cover a dayshift and I hated it! Never again, I will quit my job before they make me work dayshift.

Oh great, back to square one!

By Odins beard, thank you!
I’ve just been assuming someone’s trying to voodoo me and almost getting there.
This is a great relief.

Is this the pain that feels like a knitting needle getting rammed into your chest and only lasts for like 2 seconds but it’s two second you think “Shit! I’ve been stabbed” and everyone around looks at you because you’ve Just reacted like you’ve been stabbed.

Break out the xc skis!

I think they’re talking about books you’ve read in the library and decided not to check out, not books you’ve already checked out, taken home and are now brining back.

Altered carbon, the whole resleeving of a person into another body. Made it seem like they could have done loads of stories in that universe with different actors.
Shame they only made one series.

Slice and dice

I would hate to know how many hours I’ve spent on this game. It’s disgustingly addictive. I love it.

Sharks are older than polaris, the north star.
They are older than trees.
They have traveled around the milky way twice.

I have a headtorch like this. Keep it charged and most of the time everything is good. But that one time when I’m out skiing at night and shit goes wrong / I run out of charge it’s OK because I have a couple of AA’s in my bag as spares.

What the shit, somebody built my DMT trip!?

I would assume it’s the child’s age, they don’t want to broadcast personal details of their child on the Internet so they refer to them by their age so the context of the story still makes sense.
If they just called them as Son or daughter and told the rest of that story I would assume their still living at home in the parents basement 27 year old was just a dickhead.