ALQ

You pet the ears; my face is 100% buried in that fluffy tum before I’m mauled.

I think it’s probably with all of the fucks no one has for these bastards.

Yeah, I don’t entirely object to the reverse (as long as California is adopted into the family), but making Canada part of the US? No thank you. Fucking crab bucket mentality; can’t let other people have nice things.

The happiest of accidents!

Oh man, stop, I can only get so erect.

I am extremely disappointed that I can’t unread this.

I identify more with the sun, here: unimpressed with the world and on fire.

See, the internet censors it for you; you don’t need to do it yourself! All I see is sh!t, p!$$, c**t, c0ckscker, m0th3rfuck3r, and tits.

The Wolfcastle reference on top of everything was, dare I say it, excellent.

Alternately, do sell it, but make sure it’s guaranteed to fail and become an expensive paperweight upon first use. I’d prefer your option, but I’ll take mine if I can’t get yours.

Exactly what my mind was doing! 😂

Mmmm, corb

Also, toys. You can choose what size you prefer. This works in both same and different sex partnerships. Toys (in conjunction with an observant partner) are awesome. I’ve yet to meet a woman who was uncomfortable with us using toys together but have, unfortunately, encountered men who feel inadequate if toys are involved.

Terrible idea, but so damn satisfying.

Removed by mod

You are correct that it would be a felony, however that could be the case for throwing anything at anyone. I said it would make me happy, which is not the same as telling people it’s a safe or legal thing to do, nor that they should actually do it.

Thank you for clarifying for folks but everyone should take this as a reminder that you should take anything you read on the internet with a grain of salt.

If anyone deserves to not have food, it’s the fascists. If protesters could suddenly become pro tennis players and hit the canisters back at ICE, though, that would make me so happy.

I got a solid five seconds of laughter out of this and am still fighting a little chuckle.

Could Venezuela’s government have made this up? Possibly. They have motive and they are not the most honest people, to put it mildly.

I absolutely thought you were going to just duplicate this paragraph for the US. I’d laugh, but it would only be to mask my misery.

Fluffy drumsticks!!! 🍗🍗