Hey what gives? 75 views and no coments? Pfft typical...

Anyway nice bit of story, makes me want to see more and also wonder just where this fits in with the rest. It has the feel of being somewhere at the begining but not quite the start of the story. You definatly have me looking forward to seeing the rest of the story.

view count up to 94, only one comment . . . I realize the internet is heaven for voyeurs, but cripes . . .

Anyway, yes it's sort of near the beginning -- after introductions and starting the "getting to know you better." I've been outlining plot points and scraps of dialogue and images for the story because I can do that on breaks and lunch at work in my handy dandy notebook (the dead tree kind, since I wouldn't take a computer to work even if I had one). When the prompt came up it seemed like a good excuse to actually sit down at the keyboard and try to write an entire scene, although some of the bits are likely to be moved to other homes when I actually have something that might be called a rough draft . . . when I have a life again . . . January something . . .
*bows* glad to hear you're looking forward to more, but you'll pass out if you're holding your breath *grin*

This was way good... you should definately think about expanding on it. I had a very good feel for the characters right from the beginning.

V.

It is fast reaching the "I can't stop writing because I can't not write" stage. When the story grows faster than I have time to get it out on the page and it starts to leak out my ears, does that mean I'm a real "artist" . . . or do I still have to get Manacle completely naked first *grin*

It means the story has come to life and you cannot denigh its existance any longer. The characters will not let you rest if you try.


V.

How in Dog's name did you get a story up to (now) 117 views? Did you use porn as the preview? :)

Seriously, that's one of the better transformation sequences I've seen; it's in keeping with the characters and it's got great imagery.

Transformation must get alot of fetish hits even if it is "tame." Unfortunately, I'm sure Manacle's "fit of modesty" did nothing for repeat business :P

I am very happy to hear that you like my attempt to channel an inner wolf *grin* There is much left to do as far as pacing and some blocking and sequence issues, but that will smooth out as I get it fit in with the rest of the story.

on a side note, I saw a T-shirt at work that advertised the "Dislexic Philosophers Society" debating the existance of Dog. I LOL'd and thought of you . . . .

Yeah, it took me a while to realize that even using the category "tame," I think there was still some kind of fetish expectation... *chuckle*

I've noticed, too, that files posted in non-.txt formats tend to get fewer comments, just because I think people are curious enough sometimes to click but not to download and read if it isn't right there in front of them.

Anyway, I'll echo the other comments -- nice scene overall, particularly the transformation element.

Yeah, I knew the "non-txt" would be a problem, but I'm in the process of trying to see how I have to type to create the kind of formatting that carries over into ".txt" . . . flashbacks to sophmore typing class . . . how do I show this when I don't have fonts and extra formatting? I'm playing with which .txt encoding carries formats better here . . time will tell :P

Thank you for your nice words of encouragement and, of course, the time and effort it takes to read what is not right there in front of you *grin* I'm sure I'll look at it again when I actually get caught back up with this point in the story with new eyes and see all the stuff that is too rough and doesn't follow, but for now it's nice to hear good things about the grain of the idea . . .

I've had to hearken back to plain-text email days, using either _underscores_ or *asterisks* for italics... (Yeah, I know the asterisks are supposed to be bold, but I always thought they were easer to read for italics than the underscores.)

I thought I saw someone say that whenever FA gets its big upgrade thing, there's going to be a better text display that allows for basic formatting, but as with anything, I'll believe it when it shows up. ;)

Seems I missed the original story. c.c Regardless, I did get a good sense of, at least, Manacle and Kara. Charles I'm kind of stumped about, so I'm reading the first one now.

Okay, my big negative for this one is the dialogue is fairly dry and expository. In fact, the dialogue for the other prompt had that problem at times, as well. I can understand why Manacle would want to explain so much to Charles, but... I don't know, I'm not sure how you could change it.

Still, the ideas and the world setting remain fantastic. I hope to see more of these folks. :)

fair enough. I feel like i'm not so good at 'action.' This bit especially will probably not exist in this form in anything resembling a final draft, but it did fit the 'inn' prompt. *shrug* I guess I've been using the prompts as much as a way to help motivate me to get the back-story down on paper and (somewhat) firmed up. As such, I know I'm writing a great deal of 'exposi-story.' *sigh* Hope somebody is still awake when it gets interesting . . . .

I'll be watching. c.c I'm ALWAYS watching...

Should have read this weeks ago, when I was at the particular prompt, but the �s drove me away. This morning I thought "buggerit" and did some "download-copy-paste-replace-character" majicks and read the story. And what a great story this is. Very intense, and interesting, particularly the description of the shape-shift is nicely detailed. The story gives nice glimpses to the world and concepts you first time introduced in the "quarantine" prompt, if I remember right. Very well written, great short story, I enjoyed reading this.

thank you once again for your time. . . . for whatever reason I have had technical issues with this story since i posted it. It displays fine for me when i bring up the web page and for some other folks, yet some get all the squares glyphs. And there have been so many nice comments i am loath to delete it and repost entirely :) Thank you for adding your kind words, and like so much else here, i hope to be able to bring more of this world into the light.

I wouldn't repost this, �s or not. The story is ten months old, it is very unlikely anyone will read this. And those who read it, have the same determination I have and get it into a readeble condition in some other way. When I figured how I could get rid of those squares, it took me less than a minute to clean them away.

You're very welcome.

oh i know. I'm sure the only reason it got as many views as it did was the popularity of "transformation" fetishes around here, even if i did mark it tame :P