I have been trying for over 20 years to find something that works.
I have tried every suggestion that anyone has given me. I have tried every (relevant) medication that I could get approved for. I have asked for help from every professional I could think of.
Nothing has worked.
Hi there. I wanted to apologize for that. I understand that my words might’ve been uneasy to handle for someone who does everything to manage the condition.
When writing the original comment, I was thinking more about people who do nothing after the diagnosis. Fuck it, I’ve been there, but not with the ADHD. I was petrified by it and was using it as an excuse for a long time. I’ve lost 5 years of my life doing that, until I’ve found that I can manage it with otc medication. I let this anger slip into the original comment and I’m deeply sorry
Thank you. I really appreciate the effort put into this apology.
It’s too easy to accidentally hurt someone on the internet, and there is always the temptation to hide instead of making thing right when it does happen.
Yeah and I am currently managing my ADHD too. Absolutely does not make it a personal failing for those who can’t. It took me years to figure out what worked and I’m still just barely able to manage. Sounds like you have some internalized ableism to work on.
As someone who is familiar with the concepts of survivorship bias and anecdotal evidence I know that they can be easily learned and applied. You should give it a try.
Ah yes, you know someone with sufficiently manageable issues and who can mask well enough for you, and therefore everybody else should be able to do the same! Because all people with disabilities are the same.
You realize not everyone has the same level/type of ADHD? And not everyone responds the same to medicine? And that ADHD is often comorbid with other disorders?
Mm, so you don’t personally know what the experience is like. I have a partner with chronic pain, and though I can see what she does to handle it and get by, that doesn’t mean I know what it’s like. If I were to tell people with chronic pain, “Oh, it’s manageable, I know someone with it and I see them get along fine, so you must not be trying hard enough,” it would sound awfully insensitive, wouldn’t it?
That might sound like a far-fetched comparison, but if you understood what experiencing executive dysfunction felt like, you’d know just how disabling it can be. Good on your partner, I’m glad they’ve found a solution/system/medication that works for them. But ADHD is a spectrum just as autism is. Even though I’m AuDHD, I know the things that help me aren’t necessarily things that others would benefit from, because these conditions are highly individualized. To know one individual with one of these conditions and assume everyone else must be the same is beyond unhelpful, verging into offensive.
There’s always room to find where a little different choice, a bit more effort at some point in your life, could have saved you. Enough of an excuse to sadisticaly tear someome appart.
Removed by mod
I have been trying for over 20 years to find something that works.
I have tried every suggestion that anyone has given me. I have tried every (relevant) medication that I could get approved for. I have asked for help from every professional I could think of.
Nothing has worked.
Your comment really hurts.
Hi there. I wanted to apologize for that. I understand that my words might’ve been uneasy to handle for someone who does everything to manage the condition.
When writing the original comment, I was thinking more about people who do nothing after the diagnosis. Fuck it, I’ve been there, but not with the ADHD. I was petrified by it and was using it as an excuse for a long time. I’ve lost 5 years of my life doing that, until I’ve found that I can manage it with otc medication. I let this anger slip into the original comment and I’m deeply sorry
Thank you. I really appreciate the effort put into this apology.
It’s too easy to accidentally hurt someone on the internet, and there is always the temptation to hide instead of making thing right when it does happen.
Thanks.
Did you forget a /s?
No. As someone with a partner who has ADHD, I can see that it can be managed
Yeah and I am currently managing my ADHD too. Absolutely does not make it a personal failing for those who can’t. It took me years to figure out what worked and I’m still just barely able to manage. Sounds like you have some internalized ableism to work on.
As someone who is familiar with the concepts of survivorship bias and anecdotal evidence I know that they can be easily learned and applied. You should give it a try.
Ah yes, you know someone with sufficiently manageable issues and who can mask well enough for you, and therefore everybody else should be able to do the same! Because all people with disabilities are the same.
JFC.
You realize not everyone has the same level/type of ADHD? And not everyone responds the same to medicine? And that ADHD is often comorbid with other disorders?
Mm, so you don’t personally know what the experience is like. I have a partner with chronic pain, and though I can see what she does to handle it and get by, that doesn’t mean I know what it’s like. If I were to tell people with chronic pain, “Oh, it’s manageable, I know someone with it and I see them get along fine, so you must not be trying hard enough,” it would sound awfully insensitive, wouldn’t it?
That might sound like a far-fetched comparison, but if you understood what experiencing executive dysfunction felt like, you’d know just how disabling it can be. Good on your partner, I’m glad they’ve found a solution/system/medication that works for them. But ADHD is a spectrum just as autism is. Even though I’m AuDHD, I know the things that help me aren’t necessarily things that others would benefit from, because these conditions are highly individualized. To know one individual with one of these conditions and assume everyone else must be the same is beyond unhelpful, verging into offensive.
There’s always room to find where a little different choice, a bit more effort at some point in your life, could have saved you. Enough of an excuse to sadisticaly tear someome appart.
Free will is an illusion.
I like to say: It’s not even an illusion. It’s a dillusion.